My Paper Heart
by Zero27
Summary: A women from Miroku's past resurfaces and brings with her bad memories. Miroku is forced to face his fear of this woman and Sango says something to send miroku reeling and he ends up running away. Will the two of them get back together before it's too lat
1. Painful Memories

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha. The only characters that are mine in the story are Nayamashii and Kayou. Also I don't own the song My Paper Heart.  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Authors note~ This fan fiction was inspired by the All American Rejects song My Paper heart. I in now way own the song, or am using any lyrics of it in the story. The focus of the story is a troubling event that happened to Miroku when he was a teenager. The whole event spawns a very troubling situation with Miroku and Sango.and Blah you'll get it later. -_- Enjoy the story! And please review! Thank you ^_^  
  
My Paper Heart  
  
Chapter 1  
  
"Miroku-san, hey Miroku-san, wake up."  
  
"Huh?" Miroku opened his sleepy eyes and looked up at a dark figure that was lying on top of him. "Nayamashii? Is that you?"  
  
"Of course it's me silly. Who were you expecting?" The young woman smiled and began licking Miroku's neck.  
  
A cold chill ran down his spine, his fingertips began to burn, and his whole body begun to shake. "Please don't do that, you're scaring me."  
  
"Don't be that way, you didn't mind it last night. Do you want to continue where we left off?"  
  
Miroku quickly backed away from her, and into a corner. His breathing was heavy and his head was spinning. A bead of sweat dripped down his face. "What did you do?"  
  
Nayamashii trapped Miroku in the corner and brushed up close to him. "Don't you remember? You were hurt, and I brought you back to my home and took care of you." A small grin came over her face.  
  
Miroku's mouth began to quiver; he gulped down hard and looked at her with scared eyes. "You. You didn't."  
  
She smiled and rubbed her hand on his chest. "I couldn't resist, you were unconscious, and you looked so cute."  
  
Miroku pushed her arm to the side and stood up. "Why? Why did you do that to me?"  
  
"I'd think you'd be happy, now you can really call yourself a man." Nayamashii stood up and took a step towards Miroku.  
  
"Stay away from me!"  
  
"Don't be that way, especially after we had so much fun together."  
  
Miroku took a step backwards and hit the wall behind him. "This is."  
  
"This is what?" Nayamashii pinned Miroku to the wall and began licking his face.  
  
Tears started to swell in Miroku's eyes. His heart was racing he was frozen in fear. "This isn't right, get away from me. Get away from me!" Miroku pushed her out of his way and made a mad dash for the door.  
  
"Wait, Miroku-san! Please don't go, stay for a while. Let me help you, let me mend that paper heart of yours."  
  
"Stay away from me, you crazy bitch! I'd never stay here with you, I'm going."  
  
"You won't get far with your injuries, it's pointless for you to go. I'll find you again, and I'll bring you back to me."  
  
"I'm not your play thing, find someone else to be your love bitch, I'm done. You don't have the right to toy with people this way, you're sickening."  
  
"Don't say things like that, don't tell me you didn't like it."  
  
Miroku clenched a tight fist; his anger was erupting inside of him. "Shut you're fucking mouth! People like you should burn in hell!" Miroku sprinted out the door and didn't look back. He never looked back.  
  
"Miroku-sama." Sango shook Miroku wildly. "Miroku-sama!"  
  
'That's right, it was in this village where it happened. I was about fourteen, I was badly injured and that woman, Nayamashii, took me in. She took me in and seduced me. That's right, I remember it all now, she left me with a paper heart. That bitch, being here brings back so many bad memories.'  
  
"MIROKU-SAMA!" Sango gave the houshi a hard slap to the face. "Get your mind out of the gutter for a moment, would you."  
  
Miroku put his hand to the slap mark on his face and turned to face Sango. "Sorry lady Sango, I just have something on my mind."  
  
'What's wrong with Miroku-sama? He's so quiet and well mannered, he usually never like this. What could be on his mind that's making him act this way?' "Um, Miroku-sama."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Is there something bothering you? You're not acting like your usual self."  
  
"My usual self? Yes, I could see why you would say that. I just have a lot on my mind right now. This village holds a lot of memories for me."  
  
"Memories?" 'What is he talking about? He must have been here before, I guess. This is very odd, I wonder what could have happened here to make him act this way.' "When have you visited this place before, Miroku-sama?"  
  
"When I was a young man, I was about fourteen." 'Yes, I still remember it like it was yesterday. I'm surprised I'm even able to step foot in this place again.'  
  
"Fourteen? You were traveling alone when you were only fourteen?" 'Poor Miroku-sama, I never knew he was so alone at such a young age.' "I was used to it, I had been traveling on my own since I was eleven. Why the sudden interest in my past, Sango-chan?"  
  
"It's nothing really, I was just sort of curious, that's all." 'What could Miroku be hiding really? What's going through his head right now?'  
  
"Alright, I see then." 'Sorry Sango, I'm just not yet ready to share the memories of my past, another day I will. Not here though, never here. I still can't get that day out of my head.' Miroku slipped back off into his own little world.  
  
*Poke* "Hey, Miroku! Miroku!" Shippo began to repeatedly poke Miroku's head. "Hey, Kagome, I think Miroku is broken. He's not saying anything. What could be wrong with him?"  
  
"I'm not sure Shippo, but please stop poking him, it's obviously not working." Kagome lifted Shippo off of Miroku's shoulder and unto her own.  
  
"Fine fine, whatever you say, Kagome."  
  
"I know what's wrong with him, he probably stole a woman's heart away. Didn't you Miroku?" An evil smile came over Inuyasha's face. "Huh, huh?" *Nudge nudge.*  
  
Miroku didn't say anything and a small grimace showed on his face.  
  
"Inuyasha! That's an awful thing to say to him! So, Miroku-sama is it true?"  
  
Inuyasha's face: -_-;  
  
"Huh? I'm sorry, Kagome, I wasn't paying attention. What did you want to know?"  
  
"Nothing, It was nothing." Kagome showed a small smile. 'Man, he's really dense today.'  
  
Sango decided to speak up. Miroku's strange behavior was beginning to bother Sango. "Miroku, are you sure you're alright? You really are acting strange."  
  
Miroku was beginning to get very annoyed. All these questions he was getting bombarded with made him feel uncomfortable. Miroku responded in a harsh tone. "I'll be fine, really. Can we please get off this subject?"  
  
'Now, I know for sure something is bothering him. I'll ask him later when he's not so upset.' "Ya, whatever, if you don't want to tell us that's fine."  
  
Miroku let out a small sigh of relief. 'Good, maybe later I'll tell Sango everything, but not now, not now.'  
  
"No way! I want to now right now what's bugging you, Miroku. You've got me curious, so spill."  
  
"SIT BOY!"  
  
*Twitch* "What the hell was that for, Kagome!? What did I do?"  
  
"You're such an idiot sometimes, Inuyasha."  
  
"Answer my question, damnit!"  
  
"You're so rude! Miroku said he didn't want to talk about it, so we don't talk about it. You're so stupid sometimes."  
  
Inuyasha gave Kagome an evil glare. "I hate you so much."  
  
Kagome smiled. "I know, I know."  
  
Sango stared at Miroku for a moment. She was still very concerned about him. 'It's like he's off in his own world right now. What could have possibly happened to him all those years ago? This is all so strange.'  
  
*Thud* Miroku fell to the ground, stunned. He rubbed his head vigorously and looked over at the person he had run into, it was a woman. "Sorry about that, I wasn't paying attention. Are you alright?" Miroku offered his hand to help her up.  
  
She gladly took it and smiled. "Thank you Miroku-san, I appreciate it." An evil smile came over her face.  
  
Miroku's heart seemed to skip a beat, his mind was racing, and a deep feeling of fear overcame him. His eyes were locked on the woman he had run into. 'It couldn't be, it can't be her. It just can't be.' His body shook in fear.  
  
"What's the matter, don't you remember me? How long has it been, about five years?"  
  
At this point Miroku was just trembling, and fear totally over took him. His breathing became heavy and fear took over him. "Nayamashii."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Well, that's all for the first chapter. Did you like it? Hope so, please review for me, I'd really appreciate it. ^^ Sorry about the chapter being so short, the next ones will be longer. I'm exited to see people's reactions to the story thus far. I'll also try to have the next chapter up by tomorrow night, if I can.  
  
Adios for now!  
  
Zero 


	2. Wasted Again

Disclaimer~ I don't own the characters from Inuyasha. The only characters that are mine are Nayamashii and Kayou. I also don't own the All American Reject's song My Paper Heart.  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Authors note~ This chapter is just full of misunderstandings and huge problems. Nothing is going right for poor Miroku in this one. Please R+R, thanks! Enjoy! ^_^  
  
Chapter 2  
  
A small smile came to Nayamashii's face. "So, you do remember me, Miroku- san. I was beginning to wonder for a moment, I certainly haven't forgotten you these past five years. How have you been?"  
  
Miroku gave her a cold stare. "Don't talk to me as if we're friends, I still hate you for what you did to me all those years ago. You're a complete dirty whore, I hate you."  
  
"My my, what naughty language we have. You shouldn't be so sore about this Miroku-san, it happened a long time ago. Why don't you forgive and forget?" Nayamashii moved closer to Miroku, so close that she was right in his face.  
  
"Get the hell away from me!" Miroku pushed her aside and walked towards the direction the others had gone.  
  
"Wait a minute, don't go. Let's talk for a while, we have so much to catch up on."  
  
"Just shut up! I have nothing to say to you, leave me alone. I want nothing to do with you." Miroku turned back around and headed towards his friends.  
  
"I'm sorry, but I can't let you do that Miroku." She walked up to Miroku and put her arms around his neck. "Come on, let's catch up on old times. What do you say?"  
  
"Get your arms off of me right now!"  
  
"Huh?" Sango stopped for a moment and turned around. "I could have sworn I heard Miroku's voice. 'Hey, wait a minute; he's not here with us.' "Hey guys! Wait up a moment!"  
  
Inuyasha turned around and looked at her with an annoyed expression on his face. "What is it Sango?"  
  
"Miroku-sama, he's not here with us. I hadn't noticed, but we lost him back a ways, I think."  
  
"Damn, alright then. Lets backtrack our steps. Come on Kagome, Shippo we're heading back."  
  
It was Kagome's turn to be annoyed. "Back? Why?"  
  
"We lost the monk, he got separated from us. We need to go find him, that idiot is off in his own world and is going to get himself in trouble if we don't go and retrieve him."  
  
"Alright, lets go find our lost monk then."  
  
The gang did a 180 and walked around looking for Miroku. They didn't have to go too far when, Inuyasha spotted him out of the corner of his eye with a female clinging unto him.  
  
"Hey, guys, I think I found our missing monk." Inuyasha pointed over to Miroku with Nayamashii still clinging to the back of his neck.  
  
"Nayamashii, I mean it, get off of me right now! I have to get back to my friends, so let go of me this instant."  
  
She broke her grasp around the monk's neck and stood there pouting. "You're no fun anymore, Miroku-san."  
  
Miroku gritted his teeth at the particular comment. "Glad to hear it, now if you excuse me." Miroku was cut short when he heard a familiar voice yelling at him.  
  
"Miroku-sama! Where in the hell have you been!? We were wondering what happened to you. Were you flirting with another woman, again?  
  
"No, Sango, I wasn't."  
  
"Then who's this?"  
  
Inuyasha rolled his eyes and took Kagome by the hand. "Let's go, this ones going to take a while. Miroku is really in for it."  
  
Kagome nodded. "Ya, I think you're definitely right." The three of them walked off leaving Sango and Miroku to argue with each other.  
  
"Sango, she's nobody. She's an old." Miroku struggled for the right words. "She's an old acquaintance, nothing more." Miroku looked over at Nayamashii with a disgusted look on his face.  
  
"I don't believe you, Miroku-sama. How do I know you weren't asking her to bear your child?"  
  
Nayamashii smiled. "He didn't, you don't have anything to worry about. It's as Miroku-san says, we're just old friends."  
  
"I see, fine then." 'By the way Miroku-sama is acting around her, he certainly doesn't consider her a friend. What could be going on here?'  
  
Miroku let out a long sigh. "Well, now that this is settled lets go."  
  
"Wait a minute, Miroku-sama. What about your friend?"  
  
Miroku cringed at the word friend. "What about her?"  
  
'What about her? Miroku has never been this cold to a woman before.' "What do you mean what about her? She's your friend; lets let her enjoy our company for the night. What do you say?"  
  
"I rather not, thank you."  
  
'What the hell is up with him? I would think he'd be happy to have his friend stay with us for the night. What kind of relationship are the two of them in with each other?' "That's nonsense Miroku, she's staying with us for the night."  
  
Nayamashii had an evil grin on her face. "Thank you, you're too kind."  
  
"It's not a problem, any friend of Miroku's is a friend of ours."  
  
"Sango please, don't do this."  
  
"You're being silly Miroku-sama, she's staying." 'That way maybe I'll get some answers.'  
  
"Fine, she can stay."  
  
"Oh thank you, Miroku-san." Nayamashii gave him a big hug.  
  
Sango stood there just about ready to pop a vain. 'Why that little bitch, there has to be something more between them. Miroku better not hug her back, or I'll be really pissed.'  
  
Miroku removed her arms from him and put them to her side. "Please, don't do that again, I mean it." Miroku turned to Sango and smiled. "Shall we go?"  
  
Sango could only nod her head; she was in shock for a brief moment. 'Ok. Now I know something isn't right here. Since when does Miroku not want to hug an attractive woman? This is just freaky.' "Yeah, lets get going."  
  
As they walked each of them seemed to have something on their minds. Miroku had to constantly tell Nayamashii to stop clinging on to him and Sango had to suppress her anger, not to kill Nayamashii.  
  
Sango stood and watched as Nayamashii hung all over, Miroku-sama. She could feel a vein popping out of her head. 'Who does that bitch think she is? I can't believe she's not getting the message that Miroku-sama doesn't like her. Is this how Kagome feels when Kouga is always hitting on her? Now, I regret ever asking her to come along with us.'  
  
Miroku was getting totally frustrated by Nayamashii's stupid actions, and was looking ghostly pale. 'Stupid Nayamashii, I hate the bitch. Why did Sango have to invite her to join us for the evening? This is going to be awful, I think I'm going to be sick.'  
  
Nayamashii had a huge grin on her face, she enjoyed pissing Sango off, and it satisfied her to know how angry and jealous she was making her. 'This is so fun making the two of them so angry. Who knows what sort of fun we could have tonight?' An evil smirk appeared on her face. She began to nuzzle her face into Miroku's chest. 'Now how will he react, I wonder?'  
  
Miroku came to an abrupt stop. He was obviously very agitated. "That's it, I've had enough of you. You don't have my permission to do things like that to me. You can't touch me, and you can't get close to me. Got it!?"  
  
"Feh, that doesn't sound like the Miroku I know. Since when do you not enjoy women draping themselves all over you?"  
  
"Shut up Inuyasha, this isn't the time! I'm very vexed at the moment and you're making it worse."  
  
"Whatever, so who's your friend here?" Inuyasha looked curiously over at the young woman.  
  
"She's an old acquaintance, nothing more." Miroku's eyebrows were beginning to fidget. "Where are Kagome and Shippo?"  
  
"We're right here." Kagome appeared next to Inuyasha with Shippo resting on her shoulders. "We were beginning to wonder what happened to you guys. Why don't we all go to a bar and talk? Huh? What do you guys say?"  
  
A small smile came over Inuyasha's face. "Ya, sure I would love a drink."  
  
Miroku let out a long sigh. "Why not?"  
  
Sango looked over at Nayamashii with an angry expression. "I could really use a drink, or a lot of drinks."  
  
A big smile was all over Kagome's face. "Ok, it's settled then, we're going to the bar. Oh, hey, you coming with us?" Kagome looked over at Nayamashii.  
  
"If you'll have me, then yes."  
  
"Of course, we'd love your company. Now lets get going guys."  
  
The gang began walking and Miroku let out a small whisper to Sango. "Is it just me, or is Kagome-chan really exited about going to the bar?"  
  
"No, I think I know what you mean. It's sort of scary in a way."  
  
"Are you mad?"  
  
"About what?"  
  
"Nayamashii."  
  
"Your friend, no. She's just um well. Very straightforward, I guess you could say."  
  
"My apologies lady Sango. I didn't intend for her to come with us, I believe that was your idea."  
  
"Only because I wanted to know what she had to do with your past."  
  
Miroku had a small grimace on his face. "Some things are better left unknown."  
  
Sango noticed the monks face and couldn't help but feel bad. "Miroku, I."  
  
"Hey you two, you done chit-chatting yet? We're at the bar now. You can stop talking and get in."  
  
Miroku and Sango both looked at Inuyasha with cold stares and went inside followed by the rest of the gang. They found a suitable place to sit and all ordered some Sake, except for Shippo, he got nothing.  
  
Inuyasha took a big swig of Sake and smiled. "Man, this stuff is good tonight. What do you say we have a little drinking competition? Everyone drinks till they can't drink anymore. Who's in?"  
  
Sango raised her hand immediately. "I'm in, I need to loose some of my woes."  
  
Kagome raised her hand as well. "Sure, this could actually be pretty fun. It's nice to get hammered everyone once and a while."  
  
Inuyasha turned to Miroku. "You in buddy? Don't tell me I'm going to be the only guy."  
  
"Sorry to say that you are. I don't feel like drinking that much tonight."  
  
"Fine whatever. How about you Miroku's friend."  
  
"SHE'S AN AQUIANTENCE!"  
  
"Uh ok, you want to join in the fun Miroku's acquaintance?"  
  
"My name is Nayamashii and I would love to join your little game."  
  
"Alright then, lets start. Everyone start drinking."  
  
With in no time most of the gang was already wasted. Kagome had two shot glasses worth of Sake and was passed out on the floor. Sango had drank about three normal glasses full of Sake and was starting to get woozy. Inuyasha and Nayamashii were the only ones who were still acting normal.  
  
"I'm impressed Nayamashii, I've never seen a woman drink so much."  
  
"Thank you, I just really enjoy drinking Sake. However, I'm starting to get pretty woozy, I'll declare you the winner."  
  
"Yay! I'm the winner!" Inuyasha had a huge smile on his face. He stood up and shouted, "I'm the winner!" He then fell down and passed out.  
  
"Now that they're taken care of you and I can have some time alone, Miroku." "I don't want to be alone with you. I find it pretty devious you got all my friends drunk just to get to me. I told you before, I'm not your play thing."  
  
"Come on now, we really had some fun together. I really like you, Miroku."  
  
He looked at her coldly. "Parts of me, you mean."  
  
"Tsk tsk, I would have thought you'd grown up by now Miroku, I see that I'm wrong."  
  
"I've grown up, it's you who hasn't yet. Leave me alone; you're only going to cause more pain and trouble for me. I told you that I hate you, so go."  
  
"I can't leave you, I'm in love with you. Ever since the day I gave myself to you, I couldn't get you out of my mind. I love you."  
  
"What you did to me was wrong, I was only a kid. You're sick and twisted, I don't care if you love me."  
  
Nayamashii smiled and leaned over and kissed Miroku passionately on the lips and didn't break the kiss. It looked as if it would never end.  
  
Sango got out of her woozy daze and looked around the table. She noticed Kagome was passed out with Shippo happily sleeping next to her, and Inuyasha was passed out as well. Then she saw it, she saw Nayamashii kissing Miroku. 'I can't believe it, Miroku is kissing that girl, I just can't believe it. That bastard is going to pay.' She stood up and faced Miroku. "I hate you, Miroku!" Tears were flowing down Sango's cheek. She quickly ran out of the bar sobbing.  
  
Miroku broke the kiss and slapped Nayamashii. "You bitch! Now, look what you did! If I could, I would kill you! Get the hell away from me! I LOVE SANGO, NOT YOU!"  
  
She touched her cheek. A great sensation of pain ran through her. "Fine, Miroku I'll leave you alone. I just have some advice for you though."  
  
Miroku looked at her angrily. "What is it?"  
  
"If you lover her tell her, don't wait, you'll loose your chance." "For once I'll agree with you. Now go and never look back, I never want to see you again."  
  
"As you wish. Good bye, Miroku-san." She got up and walked out of the bar, never to return.  
  
"Good, now that she's out of the picture I can go find Sango. I need to tell her how I feel before it's too late; I don't want her thinking I'm in love with that bitch, Nayamashii. I need to go and find my true love. I need to find Sango."  
  
With that Miroku got up and ran out the door. He began his frantic search for Sango.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Wow, a long chapter, I know. However, this chapter is a crucial point in the story and is very important, as well as the next one will be. You'll definitely not want to miss it. Thanks to all the reviewers I've had so far. You're all really great.  
  
Inu-Shounen~ I'm glad you find the idea so original. I'm also happy you're so exited for the next chapter.  
  
Xtreme Chick~ It's great that you love the story so much. I'm really happy to see you enjoying it. Did I write this chapter long enough and soon enough for ya?  
  
I had one other review but sadly it wouldn't show up at fanfiction.net yet, so I didn't get a chance to see what user it was. Thank you for saying that you liked the story so much. I appreciate it. Keep reviewing for me.  
  
Thanks to all my reviewers, you're great.  
  
Zero 


	3. Words Do Hurt

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha; the only characters in this story that are mine are Nayamashii and Kayou.  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Authors note~ I know this is a really quick update, but I was very anxious to get this chapter up. This chapter really sets the tone for the rest of the story. Thanks to all my reviewers I had last chapter. You're all great, hope you enjoy the chapter.  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Sango leaned back under a tree; she was in a vast forest trying to escape the image she just saw. The forest was dead silent; the only noise heard was the wind brushing Sango's bangs in her eyes, covering the tears streaking down her face. She was off in her own state of thought. 'Miroku- sama, how could you? I really care about you, and then you do this to me. What's the real story with that woman from your past? Was she a former lover? What's the truth? I need to know.'  
  
Miroku began his search for Sango. He couldn't find her anywhere at all in the village and had decided she must have ran off somewhere. 'Knowing Sango she went somewhere to think, the only place I can think of where she would go in that case, is the forest.' Miroku quickened his pace and ran into the forest. "Sango! Sango! Where are you, Sango!? Sango!"  
  
Sango broke her train of thought for a brief moment. She looked around in a confused manner. 'I could have sworn I heard someone calling my name. It couldn't be, could it?' "Miroku! Miroku, is that you!?"  
  
"Sango! Ya, It's me. Where are you?"  
  
Sango smiled. She was sitting right behind the confused monk. "I'm behind you, idiot."  
  
"Huh?" Miroku turned around and saw Sango sitting under a tree. "I was looking for you, we need to talk." "No, I don't want to talk with you. You have nothing to say to me, that I would care to hear. I don't want your excuses."  
  
Miroku looked at her sternly. He walked over and sat under the tree with her. "Now, you're the one who's not being fair. There's something you need to know, something you're missing."  
  
"I don't want to hear your excuses! I hate you, I wish I had never met you! I wish you were dead! I wish that stupid hole in your hand would just swallow you up."  
  
Sango's harsh words started to bring tears to his eyes. "Is that how you really feel? Do you really hate me? Do you really wish that, I would die?"  
  
Sango choked down a small cry. "I hate you, just leave me alone."  
  
"I came looking for you, because I wanted to tell you something. I needed to tell you something important. Now that I hear this, it doesn't matter anymore. Good bye, Sango." Miroku did his best to restrain from crying, and got up and ran out of the forest. Under his breath he let out a small whisper. "I love you."  
  
Sango watched as Miroku ran out of the forest. 'I was too harsh on him, I shouldn't have said those awful things, but he hurt me so terribly. I'll talk with him later. I need to be alone right now.'  
  
Miroku ran back to the bar where he had left his drunken friends. He walked inside and over to the table they were sitting in. Everything was the same, Inuyasha and Kagome were still passed out and Shippo was still sleeping. He walked over and stepped on Inuyasha's head. "Wake up, idiot!"  
  
"GOD DAMNIT THAT HURT! What in the hell do you want monk?"  
  
"I'm leaving, I'm not coming back. I just wanted to say good bye to you all."  
  
"Wait a minute, wait a minute. Why in the hell are you leaving? Is this the same old bullshit with your hand swallowing us up?"  
  
"No, it's very different this time. It's Sango, she said something that hurt me deeply. I can't be with her anymore, I'd only hurt her and myself."  
  
"What did you do now, monk?"  
  
"Nayamashii made a move on me, she kissed me, and Sango saw the whole thing. She ran off before I had a chance to explain myself. I found her but she told me she wished me dead. I wanted to tell her that I loved her, but now it doesn't matter. I just want to go, I don't want to be here, anymore."  
  
"I see, it's probably the Sake talking, but it seems to me she cares about you a lot, and when she saw you kissing that girl, it really hurt her. She's just confused right now, give her time."  
  
"She said she wished I was dead, Inuyasha. I don't want to talk to her, she doesn't understand anything about the situation, and refuses to listen. If she wishes me dead, then I'll comply and just leave."  
  
"You're a bigger idiot than I thought. Don't just leave because Sango is being stubborn, talk to her."  
  
"I have nothing to say that she would believe, I just want to go. This village brings back bad memories, ones I wish to escape. I need to leave."  
  
"Miroku, what did happen? What does that woman have to do with you? What's going on?"  
  
"Don't tell Sango, she'd be hurt if she knew the truth. When I was young man, about the age of fourteen, I had visited this village and had gotten hurt in a bar fight. Nayamashii found me unconscious in the street and had taken me in. She cared for my injuries, but she also hurt me terribly. She took advantage of my helplessness and had. Had. Had seduced me. She used to lick me, and touch me in awful ways. It was sickening, she used me like a plaything. That's why I need to leave, this place brings back so many bad memories."  
  
"I see, it all makes sense now. Don't get the wrong idea but." Inuyasha stood up and hugged his friend. "If you leave, I'll understand, I wish you would stay, but if you have to go, I'm not going to stop you." 'Poor guy, I would have never though Miroku was hiding something like that. I could never feel as hurt as he must be feeling now.'  
  
"Thank you, Inuyasha. I won't forget any of you, traveling with you was an amazing experience. I was glad to have met all of you. I need to keep moving though, I need to heal my paper heart. One day, maybe I'll come back. Good bye, Inuyasha." Miroku broke the hug and left the bar.  
  
"Good bye, bouzu." Inuyasha watched his friend left the bar. A small feeling of sadness entered him. 'That stupid bitch Sango, she doesn't even realize how much she hurt Miroku, and now because of her, he left. Man, I'm going to give it to her when she comes back.' Inuyasha sat there patiently, waiting for Sango to return. 'She's not going to like this, not one bit.'  
  
After leaving the bar Miroku began wandering the streets. 'Where should I go next? Where is it that I'm going? What am I even doing? I'm just so confused right now.' Miroku stopped dead in his tracks. He could feel tears running down his face. He wiped them away and looked up at the sky. "Sango, am I doing the right thing? Will my leaving make you happy? This is all for you, Sango. You and your happiness." Miroku continued walking and was on his way to the next village.  
  
Sango walked into the bar, she was still pissed and she came to calm her nerves with a drink. She noticed Inuyasha awake, and walked over to him. "I didn't expect you to be up. What are you doing up, anyway?"  
  
"Miroku had unexpectedly woken me up."  
  
"Where is he now, then?"  
  
"He left, he said he wasn't coming back. He said that staying here with us was hurting him too much, he also said he didn't want to be with someone who wished him dead."  
  
Sango bit hard down on her lip. 'Was he kidding? Did Miroku really leave because of me? Is this all my fault then?' "Where is he headed?"  
  
"I don't know, he didn't say where he was going. Don't tell me you're planning on going after him."  
  
"Of course, I' am. I have to find him and bring him back. He belongs here with us, he belongs in this group."  
  
"Keh. Why don't you say what you mean? You like him and now you hurt him, you're the one who wants him back so bad. You feel guilty and now you want to make things right. Am I getting warm?"  
  
"Inuyasha."  
  
"You bitch, you hurt him! You didn't even understand the situation, and you said all those awful things to me him. Do you blame him for leaving? You told him you wanted him to die! He was going to tell you something important, and you said that to him. He was crying, Sango. You made a man like Miroku cry. How can you stand yourself? Tell me!"  
  
Tears started to roll down Sango's cheek. 'I can't believe it, I can't believe what Inuyasha just said. What should I do now? What's the right choice?' "Inuyasha, I need to know, I need to know what I should do."  
  
"You should go after him, but you'd probably say something stupid and make things worse. Just leave him alone for a while. He needs to think, he's carrying many things on his shoulders."  
  
"What do you mean, I'll mess things up!"  
  
Inuyasha looked at her sternly. "Miroku is going through a lot of shit right now, there's things about him you don't know yet. I'm not going to tell you, he should. Just give him time, he'll come to you."  
  
"I can't Inuyasha, I need to find him!" Sango turned around and headed out the door.  
  
"You stupid wench!" Inuyasha got up and grabbed Sango's arm. "You need to leave him alone. Give him time, he has to be on his own for a while. Just let him think, things out."  
  
"Inuyasha." Sango hugged him and began sobbing. "It's not fair, it's just not fair."  
  
Inuyasha let out a long sigh. 'Why me!? I'll kill that stupid monk for this.' "It's alright Sango, I'm sure Miroku is going to come back." 'He better, or I'll drag him back.' Inuyasha broke the hug and turned around. "I'm going to wake up Kagome and Shippo, you should get some rest Sango. I think there's an Inn next door. I'll meet you there."  
  
Sango gave a small nod. "Ya, alright, I'll see you there." Sango walked out the bar and went next door at the Inn, and waited patiently for Inuyasha to bring the others.  
  
Inuyasha walked over to Kagome and gently shook her. "Hey, Kagome, wake up. We're going over to the Inn to rest. Come on get up."  
  
Kagome lightly opened her eyes, and let out a long yawn. "What's going on, Inuyasha? Where is everyone?"  
  
"Sango is waiting for us at the Inn, Shippo is sleeping beside you, and Miroku left. He went to go off on his own for a while, I'm sure he'll be back."  
  
"Why did Miroku leave?"  
  
"Long story Kag, come on, I'll carry you back to the Inn."  
  
"Alright."  
  
Inuyasha picked up Kagome and held her tightly in his arms. He walked over and stepped on Shippo's head. "Wake up, fox! We're leaving."  
  
"Inuyasha, you're such a meanie!"  
  
"Ya, ya, shut up and jump on my shoulders. We're going over to the Inn next door."  
  
Shippo complied and the three of them walked out of the bar. Inuyasha looked up at the night sky, and let out a long sigh. 'Miroku, I hope you're okay, where ever you are.'  
  
Miroku was still making his way to the next village, he was extremely tired and disoriented. 'I can't stop now, I need to keep moving. I have to make it to the next village. I have to make it there.' Miroku took another step and collapsed. He lay unconscious on just the outskirts of the village.  
  
Kayou was walking back to her village. She liked to go out at night, and look at the stars. As she walked back to her village she noticed something laying on the ground, it was Miroku. She rushed over to him to see if he was awake. She shook him gently. "Sir, sir, are you alright, are you awake?"  
  
Miroku could feel something shaking him. He opened his eyes and saw the young woman. "Sango, is that you?" His eyes closed shut, and he slipped back into unconsciousness.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Well, did you like it? I sort of left it at a cliffhanger. I'll try to update as soon as I can. You'll definitely not want to miss the next chapter. Thanks to all the reviewers I had this chapter.  
  
Inu-shounen~ Yes, Nayamashii is a total bitch. I'm glad you like the story a whole lot, although I can't see how it's addicting.  
  
Xtreme Chick~ Thanks for reviewing for me, again. I'm glad I got two thumbs and two toes up. I'll try to continue with the suspense and high performance in my writing.  
  
Kikanemi~ Thanks for the review. I like it a lot, when Sango gets jealous like that. Poor Miroku though, the guy just can't get a break. Hope to see another review from you.  
  
Rain61~ Yes, Nayamashii is a sick person, and I'm glad you think the story is great.  
  
Thanks to all my reviewers! I really appreciate the reviews! Keep them coming, please! ^_^  
  
Zero 


	4. Trust

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha; the only characters that are mine are Nayamashii and Kayou.  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Authors note~ I'm surprised by how many people like the story so far, I didn't think it would be that much of a catch. A huge thanks to all my reviewers! I really, really love getting reviews from you guys. In this chapter we find out more about the mysterious woman Kayou, and Sango copes with the loss of her beloved houshi. There's going to be some twists and turns, you don't want to miss this chapter.  
  
Chapter 4  
  
The warm morning sun shone brightly in Miroku's eyes, he cringed at the sudden shock of the bright sun in his eyes. He opened his eyes wearily; he was sleeping on a futon, in a small hut. He sat up and took a small look around. 'It looks like I'm in a small hut; nobody seems to be around though. Where am I? What's going on?'  
  
Kayou walked in the door of the small hut. She smiled and sat down next to Miroku. "How are you feeling?" Kayou looked over at Miroku, her eyes full of concern.  
  
Miroku just sat there a moment. He had a dumbfounded look on his face. 'Ok. Now I'm really confused. Who is this girl? Did she take me in? What in the hell is going on?' "I'm feeling pretty good, tell me though. Who are you? What's going on?"  
  
Kayou smacked her head. "I'm so stupid, I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Kayou. Who are you?"  
  
"My name is, Miroku. Tell me, what happened? How did I get here?"  
  
"Easy, I can only answer one question at a time. I was walking back to the village after a late night stroll and I found you lying on the ground unconscious. I didn't want to leave you out there, so I took you back to my home. Are you sure you're alright?" She moved slightly closer to him, her face full of worry.  
  
Miroku was taken back at her sudden advancement on him. He moved away from her slightly. He had almost a scared expression on his face. 'Not again, I don't want to have to go through this, again.'  
  
Kayou looked at Miroku she was very confused by his actions. "Did I scare you? Are you afraid of me?"  
  
A small bead of sweat dripped down Miroku's brow. His breathing was getting heavy, and his head was spinning. 'What should I do? Can I trust her? I'm not sure that I can.' Miroku took a deep breath and looked her straight in the eye. "A little bit, I guess."  
  
She looked at him very strangely and slowly backed away. The next words to escape her mouth were light and caring. "You don't have to be afraid of me, I don't want to hurt you. I only want to help you."  
  
Miroku showed a sad expression on his face. He looked down at the floor. "I'm very sorry, It's hard for me to trust." He looked up and put his hand to his heart. "Someone hurt me deeply in the past, and the pain is still fresh in my mind. Being here, with you reminds me of that pain."  
  
Kayou looked at Miroku with a very sorrowful expression. 'That poor man, he's suffering inside. He's hurting deeply, I wish I could help him.' She smiled and moved closer to him. She put her hand on his hand, which was resting on his heart. "I wouldn't do anything to try and hurt you. You can trust me."  
  
The warmth of her Kayou's hand on Miroku's hand sent chills running down his spine. He let down a large gulp. 'She seems sincere, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to trust yet. I still haven't healed my paper heart.' Miroku slid his hand out from under Kayou's and put it to his side. "I'm sorry, I'm just not ready to trust, yet."  
  
Kayou shot Miroku a warm smile. "Don't worry about it, you will when you're ready. Oh, hey, are you hungry?"  
  
Miroku looked down at his stomach, he could hear it growling for food. He looked up with a light smile on his face. "Ya, I guess so."  
  
"Alright then, I'll fix us something to eat. Just rest for a while, you need to let your body regain its strength."  
  
Miroku nodded solemnly. "Aye."  
  
Sango sat in her small room at the Inn, eating her lunch. She looked around at the empty room and sighted. 'Inuyasha, Kagome, and Shippo all left to go searching for more jewel shards, which means I'm here, all alone. This really sucks; they should have taken me with them, instead of letting me sleep. I wish Miroku-sama was here, he'd keep me company.' A small band of tears rolled down Sango's cheek. "Miroku-sama, I'm so sorry, I wish you'd come back, I miss you. I didn't mean those things I said, I really care about you, I'm in love with you, so please come back to me. Come back, Miroku." Sango broke down, her soft tears turned into violent sobs.  
  
"Here you are, Miroku-san." Kayou handed him a small plate of rice. She smiled and sat down next to him.  
  
Miroku looked at the plate of rice with hungry eyes. "Arigato, I'm very hungry." Without hesitation Miroku dug into the rice.  
  
Kayou smiled and did the same. "Miroku-san, once your well rested what are you going to do. Where are you going to go?"  
  
Miroku stopped eating his rice and looked over at Kayou with a grim expression on his face. "I'm not sure actually, I don't know where I'll be going, or who I'll be going with. So much has happened to me lately, I'm not sure of anything, anymore."  
  
Kayou had a small frown on her face. "I won't try to pry, but can you tell me a bit about yourself?"  
  
Miroku looked at her uncertainly. 'Is she trying to pull something, or is she trying to be nice? What should I say, should I tell her anything?' "I guess I could tell you a bit about myself. What do you want to know?"  
  
"I can't say really, I just want to know more about you. Your family, your past, your friends, or anything."  
  
"My mother died after I was born, my father died when I was very little. A monk named Mushin raised me. I lived at his temple until I was eleven, then I set off on my own."  
  
"I'm sorry, your life sounds like it's full of hardships. Why did you set off when you were only eleven, what was your purpose?"  
  
Miroku lifted up his right hand and showed it to her. "This hand contains a curse, one which has been passed down to me, from my father. It's this curse that killed him. My right hand contains a wind-tunnel; it takes in everything in its surroundings. One day, the tunnel will devour me, as well."  
  
"That's awful! What are going to do about it?"  
  
"The only way to get rid of the curse, that I know of, is to kill the demon that bestowed the curse upon me. That's why all those years ago I set off on my own, to find the man who did this, and destroy him. I have to kill Naraku, or die trying."  
  
"I see, god handed you a cruel fate. I'm very sorry for you, it must be hard."  
  
Miroku shook his head. "Don't feel bad for me, I've done many things in life to deserve this fate. I'm not a saint, I'm a sinner, I hurt someone very dear to me, now I can never go back."  
  
'He hurt someone? Who is he talking about?' "Who did you hurt? I found you alone, remember?"  
  
"That's because, I ran away. I hurt someone deeply, she hurt me worse, and now I don't have the courage to go back."  
  
"Miroku-san, just because she hurt you doesn't mean you shouldn't try to make things right." "I want to be with her, but I'm not ready to see her again. She told me she wished I was dead. She told me she hated me, I have nothing to say to her."  
  
"She said those things because you hurt her, she cares about you obviously and whatever you said drove her off the deep end. You should really make up with her."  
  
"I will, when I heal my paper heart."  
  
"If you say so, lets go to the hot springs later. They would really do you some good, please for me." Kayou looked at him with a puppy dog face.  
  
'She better not be planning anything, I don't need another incident to happen with this girl.' "Fine, just don't try anything funny."  
  
"I wouldn't, I'm not that kind of girl. You can trust me."  
  
'I hope so.' Miroku only nodded. He stared down at his empty plate of rice. "Thanks again for the rice, it was really good."  
  
Kayou smiled. "Sure, it wasn't a problem."  
  
"That's good, I'm going to go for a walk. I'll be back later."  
  
"You really shouldn't go, you're still weak."  
  
"I'll be fine, promise." Miroku smiled and walked out the door. 'Finally, I needed some time to clear my head. I wonder, what's Sango doing right now?'  
  
Sango stood before the tree she was sitting under when it happened, when she told Miroku off. She put her hand on the tree and closed her eyes. All the memories of that night came rushing back to her. Over and over again she heard those cruel words ringing in her head. "I wish that stupid hole in your hand would just swallow you up." 'How stupid I was, I can't believe I said that to him. He didn't deserve that; he deserves a better friend than me. I said all those horrible things to him, I made Miroku cry, I really am a bitch.'  
  
Tears ran down Sango's cheek, like a small river of over flowing emotions. She slumped down under the tree, holding herself tightly. She looked up at the clear blue sky; she saw Miroku's smiling face in it. 'Miroku, I can't get you out of my head, I need to find you, we need to talk. I want to feel your warm embrace again, I don't want to be alone.' "MIROKU!" Sango burst into tears. 'Miroku.'  
  
Miroku looked up a moment. He had been taking a quiet walk in the forest to clear his head. 'I could have sworn I heard Sango calling me.' Miroku shook his head. 'No, I must be imagining things, it couldn't be her.' The scream replayed in Miroku's mind. 'It had to be her, I know it was her, I have to find her.' "SANGO!"  
  
Sango's heart seemed to stop for a brief moment. 'Miroku, I can hear his voice, I can hear Miroku calling to me. He's here, somewhere.' "MIROKU! I'm here, I'm under the tree, the same tree from before!"  
  
Miroku stared wide-eyed; he was standing directly behind Sango. He could see part of her kimono as she lay against the tree. He let down a large gulp. 'What should I do? Should I go to her? No, I can't, I'm just not ready, but then again." Miroku took a step forward; he put his hands on Sango's shoulders. "Sango, I'm here."  
  
Sango could feel Miroku's hands on her shoulders. She put her hands on top of his and held them tightly. "I've been waiting for you, we need to talk."  
  
"I agree, we do, but I'm not ready yet. I have so many things to tell you, but you need to understand, I'm just not ready. I'm sorry, Sango." Miroku retracted his hand from her tight grip and walked off. 'I'll find you again Sango, I won't leave you, don't worry, I'll be back.'  
  
Sango sat there for a moment shocked. 'No, I can't loose him again, I won't loose him like this.' Sango got up and tackled Miroku to the ground. She held him tightly; tears were beginning to swell in her eyes. "No, we aren't done yet. I need to talk with you. I need to be with you. Don't go, please stay here with me."  
  
"Sango." Miroku got up and patted the dirt off of his robes. "I know we need to talk, I'm not ready though. I can't talk with you right now my heart is still torn. Let me mend it, and then I'll come back to you. Be patient with me, please."  
  
"How can I, Miroku? My heart has been aching for you, and now I find you and you want me to give you up. How can you expect me to do that?"  
  
"If you care for me you'll let me go." Miroku put his hand out to her. "You can take me back and I'll stay with you and still be broken, or you can trust me and let me heal before I come back to you. The choice is yours; you can decide my fate this time. What do you want to do?"  
  
Sango began to tremble. 'He's letting me choose. Why? Why would he do that? He's trusting me to make the right choice, can I though? What is it? What's the right choice?'  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Yes, I'm evil and I left it at another cliffhanger. I can't help but piss you guys off. Hope you liked this chapter, thanks to all my reviewers.  
  
Inu-shounen~ Glad you liked the verbal beat down. Inuyasha laid it down thick on Sango. He's so good at making others feel like shit. I'm glad you found it all to be fabulous, and as promised I've given you more.  
  
Jen of the Wildfire~ YAY! A new reviewer! I feel so loved, knowing that I made it on someone's author alert. I'm glad you too liked Inuyasha's verbal beat down. No, you can't kill Nayamashii, I still need her.. YOU DIDN'T HEAR THAT! YOU LIE, I SAID NOTHING! NOTHING!  
  
Cyberdemon~ YAY! Yet another new reviewer. Glad you find the story good, and I tried to update as soon as I could.  
  
Kikenami~ Yay, another person saying my story is great. It's nice of you to ignore a friend to read my fic, I appreciate it.  
  
Chris-Redfield26~ Thanks for the hint, I'm not angry. I appreciate the honest help. Hope this chapter suited your need for better dialog, and moving a bit slower. Any way, thanks for the nice review, glad you find the story nice so far. Sango-chan~ Thanks for reviewing for this chapter. I'm glad you find this to be another great story.  
  
Rissi-Sama~ YES! I REMAIN TWISTED! I don't know how I come up with them, strange things go through my head I find some of the parts funny, so I don't think it's just you. Thanks for the compliment, of me doing a great job.  
  
Thanks so much to all my reviewers! I want to see you guys back again for this chapter. You have to read the next one, it's a major part of the story in a way. Eh, hard to explain, just read it.  
  
Zero 


	5. Can't Get My Mind Off of You

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha, the only characters that are mine are Nayamashii (the slutty bitch) and Kayou (the caring nice person)  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Authors note~ Sorry that I left the story at such a cliffhanger, but it's fun to make people anticipate your next chapter. You may be surprised by what happens in this chapter, and it may also be exactly what you're expecting. I don't know for sure, but I will be throwing in some twists later on. So keep reading and reviewing! Thank you! Enjoy chapter 5!  
  
Chapter 5  
  
Sango slowly reached out her hand; it was shaking nervously as it grew nearer to Miroku's hand. Sango's hand touched Miroku's for a brief moment before she brought it back to her side. 'I want to take him by the hand and bring him back to me, but I can't. I want to hold him close to me and tell him that I love him, but I can't. I want to make him mine and never let go, but I can't.'  
  
Sango bit down hard on her lip. Tears were beginning to swell in her eyes. She looked up at Miroku; he looked so calm and clear, as if he knew things were going to work out. 'How can he have such faith in me that I'm going to make the right decision, how does he know I'll choose correctly?' Sango reached her hand back out towards Miroku.  
  
Miroku looked at Sango's hand and back at Sango. "Sango, what's it going to be? You have to choose, the worse thing you can do is to make no choice. What are you going to do?" A small tear escaped Miroku's eye. "What's your decision?"  
  
Sango noticed the tear, one of her own escaped and trickled down her face. 'I know what I have to do; he needs to know how I feel. The right choice has always been obvious. I need him and he needs me, we need each other, and we'll have one another.' Sango took Miroku's hand pulled him in towards her. She held him in a tight embrace. 'This is the right thing, I know it.' Tears began to stream down Sango's face. Miroku lost his breath for a brief moment, his heart was racing, his whole body felt anxious. 'That's how it's going to be; you're taking me back with you. You aren't going to let me go, you want me to stay.' Miroku tried to break away from Sango's embrace, but Sango held him even tighter. "Sango, you have to let go, this is all too much. I'll go back with you, but you need to let go."  
  
Sango shook her head. "We're not going back together, Miroku. I'm going to let you go, I care about you, I want you to be happy. Go mend your paper heart, I'll be waiting for you." Sango choked down a cry. Miroku's face looked stun. "This hug will remind you of me, I'll be waiting. Please come back, you have to come back." Sango let go of her tight hold on Miroku.  
  
Miroku stood there, he was totally shocked, and he was staring wide-eyed at Sango. 'She's really going to let me go, she really does trust me.'  
  
"Don't look at me like that, just go, and become happy. Do what it is you must, just come back. Alright?" More tears escaped Sango's eyes.  
  
Miroku nodded, he swept away Sango's tears and smiled. "Don't cry, I promise I'll come back." Miroku turned away. "You can't get rid of me that easy." He slowly walked away from Sango, and headed towards Kayou's hut. 'Thank you Sango, thank you.'  
  
Sango held her hand close to her heart. 'Good bye Miroku.' Sango showed a small smile. 'I couldn't tell you today, but I will real soon. I'll tell you that I love you. Till then, I'll be waiting you stupid monk.' Sango began walking out of the forest. 'I'll be waiting.'  
  
Miroku was nearly out of the forest, Kayou's hut was slowly coming into view. 'I'm almost there, maybe I shouldn't go to the hot springs with Kayou tonight. After what just happened, I don't think I can be with another woman.' Miroku shook his head. 'No, Kayou is different. This whole situation is different.' Miroku reached Kayou's hut. He walked in and noticed Kayou sitting by her lonesome. He couldn't help but hide the surprise in his face. "What are you doing here? I would have thought you'd be out."  
  
Kayou shook her head. "No, I usually spend a lot of my time at home. I don't go out very much. How was your walk?"  
  
Miroku went and sat down next to Kayou. "It was alright, I met her there."  
  
Kayou looked pretty confused. "Met who?" She moved closer to Miroku, she was getting interested.  
  
Miroku hadn't noticed Kayou's advancement on him. "The girl who had hurt me so bad. The one I hurt as well." Miroku let out a long sigh. "She wants me back. She wants me to stay with her. I want to be with her, but I don't think I'm ready." Miroku looked over Kayou. "What should I do?"  
  
Kayou scratched her head. "What should you do, huh? I'm not really sure, it depends, I guess."  
  
"I don't get it. Depends on what?" Miroku stared at Kayou strangely. "What do you mean?"  
  
Kayou smiled. "I mean, it depends on how you feel about her. Do you want to go back with her. Do you want to stay with her?"  
  
Miroku looked down at the floor. "I'm not sure, I don't know. I don't know what it is that I want." Miroku ran his finger in a circle on the floor. "Part of me wants to be with her, but the other part is afraid. I'm torn, I don't know what I want. I just don't know."  
  
Kayou stood up and put her hand on Miroku's shoulder. "Then maybe you should find out." Kayou smiled at him. "Come on, let's go to the hot springs, they'll clear your head."  
  
Miroku nodded and got up. "I think you're right." He seemed to have a small grin on his face. "Shall we go?" Miroku extended his hand towards Kayou and stood half way out the door.  
  
"Ya, lets go." Kayou took Miroku's hand and the two of them headed off towards the hot springs.  
  
Sango sat quietly back at her room at the Inn. Inuyasha and the others hadn't returned yet. It was starting to get dark outside; you could see the night sky beginning to shroud everything in darkness. Sango looked out at the night sky and let out a long sigh. Her thoughts still brought her back to Miroku-sama. She couldn't get him out of her head. 'Miroku, when will you come back? I'm lonely without you, I miss enjoying your company.' Sango winced at the thought of Miroku not being around. She let out a low whisper. "Do you miss me?"  
  
"Sango-chan! Hey, we're back! How are you?" A smiling Kagome rushed into the room, a big grin on her face. She walked over to her friend's side. She knelt beside her, and looked at Sango strangely. Sango seemed to be off in a different world. Her eyes were glazed over and she wore a sad expression on her face. "Is something wrong?"  
  
Sango couldn't form the words in her mouth. "I...I." A small tear escaped Sango's eyes. "I saw him. He wouldn't come back though." Sango leaned on Kagome's shoulder. "I couldn't get him to come back." Sango tried to choke down her cries. "He wouldn't come back, Kagome-san."  
  
Kagome bit down on her lip, hard. She shot a glance at Inuyasha; he was still standing in the doorway. He hadn't moved an inch into the room. Her pleading eyes met his; they were just screaming HELP. "Please, do something Inuyasha." Kagome looked at the pathetic and broken down Sango. "Hurry."  
  
Inuyasha let a small sigh escape him. "Come on Shippo, let's cheer Sango up." Inuyasha walked over and put his hand on Sango's shoulder. "What happened?" He looked at the demon slayer with a great seriousness in his face. "What's going on, Sango?"  
  
"Miroku, I saw him I saw Miroku, I was taking a walk in the woods, and he found me." Sango looked down at the ground her voice quieted. "I wanted him to come back with me, but he said he couldn't, so I let him go."  
  
Inuyasha's mouth hung wide open. He clenched a tight fist, trying to keep himself from exploding. "Sango, why did you let him go!?" Inuyasha's face was beginning to turn red.  
  
Kagome's face and Shippo's Face -_-;  
  
Kagome picked up Shippo and put him on her shoulder. "We better go Shippo, this is going to get heated." Shippo nodded. "Ya, those two are scary when they're angry."  
  
Kagome and Shippo cautiously slipped out the door, and ran for their lives.  
  
Sango looked at Inuyasha, she had fire in her eyes. "You insensitive asshole! He wasn't ready to come back yet! I didn't want to force anything on him." Sango stood up and headed for the door. "I need to clear my head, something about hanging around with assholes makes me sick."  
  
Inuyasha immediately stood up and was in Sango's face. "You bitch! I was trying to be sensitive to your feelings and you pull something like that. What the hell is wrong with you, Sango?"  
  
Sango was infuriated. "Nothing is wrong with me you idiot! Just leave me the hell alone! I don't want to talk with you, I don't want to be around you. I want to be left alone." Sango stood there trying to catch her breath, yelling at Inuyasha was tiring.  
  
"Keh." Inuyasha folded his arms. "You wouldn't rather be alone, no I think you rather be curled up with Miroku on the futon. Wouldn't ya?" A small glint came into Inuyasha's eye, he had an evil smirk on his face. "Am I right?"  
  
Sango looked at Inuyasha with sad eyes. "Why are you this way, why are you so insensitive? You're always hurting others, just give it a rest. You're such an asshole." Sango let out a muffled cry. "Think of someone else for once, and how they might be feeling!" Sango gave Inuyasha a hard slap on the face. "Good bye, oh and you're right. I would rather be with Miroku, he thinks about people besides himself."  
  
Inuyasha stood there dumbfounded as he watched Sango leave the Inn. He put his hand to the slap mark on his. 'What just happened here? I was being the nice guy and I end up getting slapped. That's not fair.' Inuyasha let out a long sigh, he looked around the room and noticed no one around. "Hey, what happened to Kagome and Shippo?"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Miroku engulfed himself in the hot indulging water. Every muscle in his body was relaxed. The warm water was slowly healing all his sores and pains, it was as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He smiled gently. "This feels really nice." He turned and noticed Kayou was right next to him, his face turned a light shade of pink. "How do you feel, Kayou?"  
  
Kayou blinked her eyes for a moment, she had forgotten that Miroku was with her at the springs. She blushed slightly. "I'm sorry, Miroku-san I had forgotten you were here with me. I'm just so relaxed right now."  
  
Miroku nodded. "Yes, I know what you mean." Miroku looked out at the night sky. The stars were literally shimmering in the sky; it was a beautiful sight. 'Sango.' Miroku looked off into space, his mind kept wandering back to Sango. 'These gorgeous stars remind me of your beauty. I wonder, are you thinking of me right now?'  
  
Kayou looked at Miroku curiously, she wondered what was going through his head right now. 'He seems so out of it, it's like he's off in his own world. What is he thinking about?' "Miroku-san." Kayou nudged Miroku. "Miroku-san."  
  
Miroku didn't notice Kayou nudging him. He was too deep in thought to even notice. 'Sango, did I make the right choice? Did I? Being without you hurts, I'm hurting. Are you?' A small tear streaked down Miroku's face. 'Is my decision hurting you too?'  
  
Kayou's face looked almost shocked. 'He's crying? Why?' Kayou put her arm on his shoulder. "Miroku-san, are you alright?"  
  
Miroku felt the warm touch on his shoulder. 'Sango.' He put his hand on over Kayou's hand. "I'll be fine, I'm just thinking."  
  
Kayou removed her hand from Miroku's shoulder and turned away from Miroku's gaze. "Thinking of what?" Kayou could feel her eyes stinging with tears. 'Damn, I'm falling in love with him. I know he's taken, but I have feelings for him.' Kayou motioned to get out of the spring.  
  
Miroku saw this and grabbed her wrist. "Please don't go, I don't want to be left alone." Miroku's face was pleading for her to stay. "If you want, we can talk."  
  
Kayou nodded and sat beside Miroku. "Miroku-san, what's bothering you? You've barely said a word to me since we arrived at the springs."  
  
Miroku let out a long sigh. "I'm sorry, it's just I can't get what happened in the woods out of my mind. I can't get her out of my head. The hurt expression on her face when I told her I wasn't coming back with her, I feel awful." Miroku turned to Kayou his face was very serious. "Did I do the right thing?"  
  
Kayou shook her head. "Miroku." Kayou took his hand and put it to his heart. "What does this tell you?"  
  
Miroku blushed, and held Kayou's close to his heart. He looked straight into her eyes, as if he were looking at her soul. 'She's kind spirited, she reminds me so much of Sango.' "Thank you."  
  
Kayou shook her head. "It's nothing. Tell me though, when will you go back to her?" Kayou looked at him hopefully, hoping she may have a shot.  
  
Miroku closed his eyes. "When I heal my paper heart." He sank below the warmth of the springs. His whole body felt numb and cold. The pain of leaving Sango was fresh in his mind again. 'Sango.'  
  
Kayou sighed. 'I gave my heart to a man who is already taken, damn now I'm hurting. Love sucks.' Kayou got out of the springs and quickly put on her clothes. She turned her attention back to Miroku. "I'm leaving Miroku, I'll meet you back at the hut."  
  
Miroku only nodded, half hearing what Kayou had said. 'I wish you were here Sango. I'm miserable without you.'  
  
Kayou shook her head and left. 'The poor guy, he's got it bad for her. She must really be something to have him swoon over her like this. She doesn't know how lucky she is.' Kayou slowly walked away, leaving the houshi to his thoughts. 'I fell in love with the man who has a paper heart.'  
  
Miroku turned to his side expecting to see Kayou sitting beside him. He quickly realized she wasn't there. 'When did she leave? I don't remember her saying anything.' Miroku looked back up at the night sky, his sad eyes embracing the darkness. 'I must have driven her away, just like Sango.' Sango slowly made her way to the hot springs. She was still infuriated at Inuyasha and she really needed to calm her nerves. 'That stupid asshole Inuyasha, I could kill him right now. Why in the hell did he have to bring up, Miroku?' Sango stopped walking for a moment. She had just about reached the springs. 'What is he trying to get me to admit? What does he know that I don't?' Sango sighed. 'This is just too much, I need to relax the springs will help calm me.'  
  
Sango walked into the small clearing where the springs were located. She noticed someone already in the springs. She took a closer glance and just about fainted. "Miroku." Sango's mouth hung wide open; she couldn't believe her eyes.  
  
Miroku heard his name being said and turned his head to notice Sango standing right in front of him. Miroku lost his breath; his heart seemed to almost stop. He stared at Sango wide-eyed in total shock. He could barely from words in his mouth. He spoke to her, in barely a whisper. "Sa. Sango."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Authors note~ Did you like the chapter? I'm sorry that it wasn't too long; I kept changing what I was going to do with this chapter. I rewrote it several times. I hope this new rewrite is better than what I was originally planning. Also sorry it took me a while to update, lets just say some unexpected obstacles got in my way. I was going to have this chapter up by Monday evening and have the 6th chapter up by Thursday night. Well, that's not what's going to happen now. Sorry, I'm going to be away for the weekend. I'll be back Sunday night, and I'll start working on the 6th chapter. Till then, hope you enjoyed the 5th chapter. Thanks to all my reviewers!  
  
Inu-Shounen~ Sorry, but I just love torturing you. YAY CLIFFHANGERS!  
  
Sango-Chan~ I may bring back the whore, I haven't decided yet. I've actually changed the story a lot from what I was first going to do. So, maybe I wont bring her back. Don't know yet.  
  
StarryEyedChick~ Thanks a lot for the nice review, I tried taking some of your advice and added some more description and less dialog. I hope this chapter is a deal better than the others. Tomboy~ Please don't use your review as propaganda for the new Inuyasha eps, any one who is a fan already knows that. But a thanks for saying the chapter was nice. I'll kill you though if you review again and talk about new Inuyasha episodes. That's not what reviews are for.  
  
Rissi-Sama~ Few people get me; I just can't bring them together, yet. It's not quite the right time, maybe soon though.  
  
Rain61~ Glad you love it! Thanks! ^_^  
  
Iloveinuyasha1029~ Yay, another person who loves my story. Sure, I'd be happy to help you with ideas for your story, just email me.  
  
Chris-Redfield26~ Thanks for saying I'm one of the good authors. I really like getting honest opinions, that way I can improve on my writing a lot more, so if I'm improving I have no reason to be angry. Thanks for saying the 4th chapter was a lot better; I hope this one suits your liking as well. Also thanks for the compliment about being a great author one day, I don't know if I'll ever write as a profession though, and sorry to keep you waiting for this chapter. BUT I GOT IT UP! He he he ^_^  
  
THANKS SO MUCH TO ALL MY REVIEWERS! YOU'RE ALL GREAT! *Big smile* Please continuing reviewing for me! Thank you! ^_^  
  
Next chapter, some interesting developments come at the springs. You won't want to miss it. Expect the chapter to be up by Monday evening.  
  
Adios,  
  
Zero. 


	6. To Understand

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha, the only characters that are mine are Nayamashii and Kayou  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Authors note~ I KNOW, I KNOW! I said I would have this chapter up Monday night and it's Friday night. Let me explain, basically I got home late Monday afternoon instead of Sunday night and when I got home Monday I had to do a bunch of chores. Then the rest of the week I was totally tied down with school, and every time I got a good opportunity to write I ended up crashing on my coach. Today, I finally have gotten my ass in gear and have been working on this chapter feverishly. I hope you like this chapter, sorry to have kept you waiting.  
  
Chapter 6  
  
Miroku's heart just about leaped when he laid eyes on Sango. He immediately stood up and took a step towards her. He was so oblivious to everything else, that wasn't Sango.  
  
Sango's eyes widened, her face turned a bright red, like a tomato. She started to form words in her mouth but nothing came out. She was in utter shock. 'Oh my god, I can't believe Miroku just did that. What do I do know? What should I say?' "Uh, Miroku."  
  
Miroku noticed the shocked expression all over Sango's face, he looked down for a moment and back up at Sango, his face turned the brightest shade of red possible. He quickly sank back into the springs. "Sango. I. I. I'm sorry about that, I was just so happy to see you and wasn't thinking clearly."  
  
Sango could only nod her head; she was still in shock of what just happened. 'I can't believe that just happened, or that Miroku would be so exited to see me. What should I say to him? Oh god, he's staring at me now, speak stupid. SPEAK!' "Uh. It's alright Miroku, don't worry about it."  
  
Miroku let out a deep sigh. "Good, I'm glad you're not angry." Miroku's eyes met with Sango's eyes. His voice was tender and caring. "Sango, have you been?" Miroku bit down hard on his lip. "I've been thinking about you constantly." Miroku paused a moment and stole a glance at Sango's expression. He looked deep into her eyes. "The thing is, I can't get you out of my mind."  
  
Sango's mouth began to get dry, her palms were starting to get sweaty, and she had a light blush on her face. "Miroku." Sango stopped herself; she didn't know what to say to him. She was caught completely off guard by his statement. 'I should say something to him, but I just.' Sango took a deep breath. "Miroku, what are you saying?"  
  
Miroku looked down at the water, he had a sad expression on his face. "Sango, I've been doing a lot of thinking lately and I've realized something."  
  
Sango's face was totally blank, now she was really interested. "What is it Miroku?" Her voice was almost quivering, she was almost afraid to hear what the monk was going to say.  
  
Miroku licked his lips; he was beginning to get exceedingly nervous. "I've realized how lonely I am without you. I'm always thinking of you, you're always on my mind." Miroku looked up at her, tears were stinging in his eyes. "The truth is Sango I've been hurting ever since the day I left, my heart has been aching to see you."  
  
Sango lost her breath at that moment; she couldn't believe what he just said. She shook her head a moment, brining herself back to reality. "Miroku, do you really mean it, or are you just toying with me?"  
  
Miroku had a hurt expression on his face, a small tear streaked down his face. "I've hurt you in the past, haven't I?"  
  
Sango's heart sank; she didn't know what to tell him. "Miroku." Sango took another step closer to the springs. "If you know that you hurt me, then why do you do it?"  
  
Miroku showed a small frown. "I never had the intention of hurting you Sango, I never even realized I did, that is until." Miroku stared down at the water. "Until I was reminded of the pain of being toyed around with." Miroku looked back up at Sango. "I'm so sorry, Sango. Can you forgive me?"  
  
Sango nodded, a small tear escaped her eye. "Of course I can Miroku, don't get worked up over it. It's nothing, really."  
  
Miroku shook his head. "No Sango, it's not nothing. I really am sorry, I just want to start over, and this time I don't want to hurt you.  
  
"Miroku." Sango held her hand close to her heart. Tears were streaming down her face. A strange feeling had overtaken her. "Do you really mean it? You're not just trying to win me over."  
  
"No, I don't want to win anyone over. I just want to be with you, I just want to make things right. Can you trust me?"  
  
Sango nodded happily. "Yes, I trust you, Miroku." Sango stared down at her feet. "Um Miroku."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Would you mind if I joined you in the springs?" Sango's face turned a dark shade of red. She wasn't sure what to expect.  
  
Miroku chuckled. "Sango, I'm very surprised with you. I would have never thought you'd even ask. However, if you want to I don't mind." Miroku turned his back to Sango. "Here, I'm not looking so you can go ahead and change."  
  
Sango nodded. "Ok, no peeking though, or you know what will happen."  
  
"Aye lady Sango, I promise, no peeking."  
  
"Good." Sango smiled and whipped off her clothes quickly. She was extremely anxious to join Miroku in the springs. Sango submerged herself in the springs. The warm water rushed over her body, ever muscle seemed to be relaxed by the soothing feel of the hot water. She sank down deep into the water next to Miroku. "It's ok now, you can turn around."  
  
Miroku turned back around and was speechless. 'She's gorgeous, I can't believe how beautiful she looks.'  
  
Sango titled her head slightly. "Is something wrong, Miroku?"  
  
"No, nothing's wrong, I'm just overtaken by your beauty lady Sango."  
  
Sango turned a shade of red. "Miroku."  
  
There was an unsteady silence between the two of them; both of them were too overwhelmed by the situation to say anything.  
  
Sango sat there letting the warm water relax her. She was unsure of what to say and looked terribly uncomfortable. 'This was a mistake, what was I thinking? I wanted to get close to Miroku but maybe not this close. God, what should I say to him?'  
  
Miroku took a deep breath. 'Come on Miroku, you can do this. Just talk to her, everything will turn out fine. She nervous and you need to calm her down and relax her.' "Sango." Miroku moved a little bit closer to her. "It's ok, I know you're a bit uncomfortable but just relax. I promise, I wont do anything perverted. I just want to talk with you, that's all."  
  
Sango let out a long sigh. "Thank you Miroku, I'm sorry, I guess I'm just a little more uncomfortable than I thought I would be."  
  
"It's alright don't apologize, it's not a big deal." Miroku moved even closer to Sango, now he was sitting right next to her. His body was barely brushing up against Sango's. He turned his head and looked straight into Sango's eyes. "There's something I need to tell you."  
  
Sango's stomach began churning; she had butterflies going through her. "What. What is it, Miroku?" She was starting to shake, just anticipating the moment.  
  
"Sango, I think." Miroku stopped dead in his tracks; he was at a loss of words. He couldn't tell Sango that he was in love with her. His breathing began to get heavy. 'If I don't say it now I may never get the chance, but she may not feel the same way and I may get hurt, again. No, I have to go for it, I have to tell her.' "Sango, I..." Miroku's eyes shot wide open, he heard a noise and turned around quickly. Kayou was standing right at the edge of the springs. Miroku's mouth hung wide open. "Kayou?"  
  
Kayou was literally just stunned. "Mi. Miroku. Gomen, I didn't know you were here, *Kayou's eyes darted to Sango*, with another woman."  
  
Sango turned her head over to the woman standing besides the springs. Sango was blushing madly at this point and was extremely furious with Miroku. "Miroku, who is this woman!?"  
  
"This is Kayou, lady Sango. I've been staying with her for the last couple days. I had passed out on the road and she took me back to her hut."  
  
Sango cocked her eyebrows. "I see, so you've been with her for the last couple of days."  
  
"Sango, don't look at me like that. Nothing happened between us, I can assure you."  
  
Sango was beginning to get extremely annoyed. She clenched a tight fist and the pissed Sango took over. "I don't care what sort of relation ship you two have with each other." *Twitch twitch* "But since It's none of my business I'll leave you two alone." Sango motioned to get up out of the springs.  
  
Miroku quickly grabbed her arm. "No wait Sango, we're not like that. Kayou is just a friend, all we've been doing is spending time together, talking. That's all."  
  
A small tear ran down Sango's cheek. She tried pulling her arm away from Miroku. "Let me go! I don't want to be here anymore, just let me leave!"  
  
"No! Sango, you're not listening to me." Miroku pulled her arm towards him. "Just wait, listen to me. I want to be here with you. Don't just leave."  
  
"I don't care Miroku, just let me go!"  
  
Miroku gritted his teeth. His anger was rising inside of him. "Just shut up and listen to me!" Miroku was quite taken by what he just said. He let go of Sango's arm immediately.  
  
Sango was speechless, she couldn't believe what just happened. "Miroku. I."  
  
Miroku hung his head down. "Just go Sango, I don't care anymore. Go ahead and leave."  
  
Sango had a hurt expression on her face. She was going to say something but she instead got up and walked out of the springs. She quickly put on her clothes and ran off. Tears were falling from her cheeks. 'Damn you, Miroku! Why do things always have to turn out this way?'  
  
Miroku watched as Sango ran off, his heart seemed to sink a little. A strong sensation of pain, regret, and sorrow overtook him. Tears slid down his face, he was crying. All those emotions he had been holding in came poring out. "Sango, I love you."  
  
Kayou was still just standing there. She didn't know what to say or do, she just stood there. "Miroku, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cause trouble for you. Maybe you should catch up to your friend, she seemed very upset."  
  
"No." Miroku shook his head, his tears were still escaping from his eyes. "There is nothing I could say to her that she would care to hear."  
  
"What about, I love you?"  
  
Miroku bit down hard on his lips, to the point of bleeding. "I should tell her, but I don't think I'm ready yet. It's funny, I'm actually terrified of telling her."  
  
Kayou was starting to get very annoyed with Miroku's shyness problem. "Why? I just don't get it, Miroku."  
  
"If you let me get my clothes on, I'll tell you. It's sort of a long story."  
  
Kayou nodded. "Ok, that's fine." Kayou turned around and waited patiently for Miroku to put on his clothes.  
  
Miroku quickly got of the springs and put on his clothes. He was shaking slightly, he was still upset over what just happened with Sango. He wiped away his tears and finished dressing. "Okay kayou, I'm ready." Kayou turned back around and walked up next Miroku and grabbed his hand. She dragged him away from the springs and started leading him back to the hut. "Miroku, we can talk once we get back to the hut. Okay?"  
  
Miroku was beginning to get annoyed by Kayou's behavior. "Fine, but you can let go of me. I'm not a child."  
  
Kayou broke her grip on Miroku's arm. "I'm sorry, I just wanted to get back to the hut quickly, so we could talk."  
  
Miroku sighed. "I know, it's fine." Miroku walked slowly with Kayou beside him. The two of them walked silently all the way to the hut. Neither of them knew what to say to one another. They finally reached Kayou's hut and went inside.  
  
Miroku collapsed unto the futon. He was emotionally and physically exhausted. His body was terribly strained with everything that had happened to him. 'Great, how do I explain myself to Kayou, now?'  
  
Kayou sat beside Miroku on the futon. She touched him on the shoulder briefly. "Are you okay, Miroku? You seem very tired, you should get some rest. We don't have to talk now, we can wait till tomorrow."  
  
Miroku sighed slightly and sat up. "No it's okay, I don't mind. Besides, I really need to get this off my chest."  
  
Kayou nodded. "Ok fine. So what did happen to you? Why do you seem to be so uncomfortable when you're alone with women?"  
  
"It was a while back, I was about fourteen years old. I had gotten into a fight and was badly injured, I passed out on the street and a young woman, *Miroku turned to Kayou*, such as yourself took me back to her home."  
  
"Uh huh." Kayou was starting to get very interested. "So what happened?"  
  
"When I woke up, she was on top of me. I didn't realize it immediately but the woman had raped me. She took advantage of my disoriented state and did awful things to me." Tears were beginning to swell in Miroku's eyes. His voice seemed to have quieted. "I couldn't fight back, I couldn't do anything at all. I was paralyzed in fear, I was so scared and nobody was there to help me."  
  
Kayou shook her head. A tear fell to the ground. She moved closer to Miroku and wiped away his tears. "No child should ever have to go through something like that." Kayou wrapped her arms around Miroku in a tight embrace. "No one."  
  
More tears came streaming down Miroku's face. He attempted to hold back his tears but he just couldn't anymore. It all came flowing out of him. "The way she used me, it was sickening, I don't ever want to be hurt that way again. That's why.. That's why I'm so afraid, I was hurt once and I don't want to feel that hurt again."  
  
Kayou tightened her embrace on Miroku. She rubbed his back gently. "I understand now, it'll be alright. I promise, I wont hurt you that way." Kayou broke the embrace and looked at Miroku with sad eyes. "However, you need to tell the person you love, you need to tell Sango this. She doesn't know any of this, you need to make her understand."  
  
Miroku started to shake. His voice was starting to break up. "I know. I know that, but I'm just so afraid. Afraid of what she might say, I just don't want to get hurt."  
  
"Miroku, if you don't tell her you'll only be hurting yourself and Sango. You have to tell her. Holding back your emotions is wrong, you need to get these things off your chest."  
  
"Kayou." Miroku sat quietly for a moment. Absorbing everything Kayou had just said to him. "Kayou, would it be wrong to still wait a while? Would it be cowardly of me?"  
  
"Miroku, I don't understand. What are you waiting for?"  
  
"I need to mend old wounds, before I re-open them again. I need to fight one battle at a time. I'm not over this incident yet and I don't want to get myself caught in another with Sango."  
  
"I understand Miroku, but you shouldn't wait too long. You might change your mind about telling her that you love her."  
  
"I don't even know if I love her, I think I do but sometimes she hurts me so terribly I wonder if I really do love her. I'm just all messed up, everything hurts, and nothing makes sense."  
  
"Miroku." Kayou stroked her hand through his bangs. "You'll be alright, everything will eventually make sense. You're welcome to stay with me as long as you like." Kayou got up off the futon. "Now, you need to get some rest, everything will seem clearer after a good night sleep."  
  
"You're probably right." A large yawn escaped Miroku's mouth. "I' am pretty tired, I guess." Miroku laid his head down and let sleep fill his eyes. In no time his exhaustion had taken over, he was sound to sleep.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Man, that was a long chapter. That's for making up the long time without an update. With school starting now I'll probably just be updated my story once a week. That is unless I get a few nights without homework. Any way I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I can't wait to get some good reviews. Thanks a whole lot to all my reviewers so far! You're great! ^_^  
  
Inu-shounen~ BAH! For once I didn't leave it at a cliffhanger, I could have been evil and left it when Kayou found Miroku and Sango at the springs, but it was just too short to leave it there. Hope you like this chapter, and don't you dare hack into my comp, or I'll kill you.  
  
Rissi-Sama~ Thanks, I'm glad you think that I'm improving. And no, I wont put Kayou and Miroku together, I'm not that crazy.  
  
Rain 61~ Glad you still think the story is great, please keep the good reviews coming.  
  
StarryEyedChick~ Glad you like the whole confrontations with Sango and Inuyasha, I'm glad you didn't think it was too much. And yes, Kayou should have hit Miroku, but she's too nice to do that. Maybe another time though.  
  
Kyosnekozukigirl~ Man, your name is long and fun to type. Glad you really like the fic and sorry about the long wait for an update.  
  
No1~ Hey! A new reviewer! YAY! Glad you think the story is awesome, and sorry again about the long wait for an update.  
  
Chris-Redfield26~ No, it's okay, I really do enjoy the advice. Yes, it is a bit much to keep repeating paper heart, gomen, I'll try not to do that so much. Please review for this chapter, I really want to hear your opinion of it.  
  
Missy-Bee~ Just for you I had Sango get to see Miroku naked, now no complaining, and this chapter was nice and long too.  
  
Sango-Chan~ Yes, Kayou isn't in a good position but that's what makes stories so interesting, what people do in odd situations.  
  
Sweet Chaos~ Glad you decided to review for this story, I'm glad that you're enjoying it enough to review. Thanks a lot!  
  
THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU ALL! I LOVE GETTING YOUR REVIEWS! YOU'RE ALL GREAT! THANKS SO MUCH!  
  
Next chapter~ Things between Kayou and Miroku begin to heat up, Sango is left feeling jealous and Miroku is just caught in the middle. Update expected possibly Sunday night. depending on the number of reviews. Enjoy!  
  
Zero 


	7. Hidden Emotions

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha; the only chars that are mine are Nayamashii and Kayou.  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Dream sequence~ *meep meep meep*  
  
Authors note~ A lot of people seem to be really enjoying the story and I'm very happy about the number of reviews I've been getting. In light of this I'll be trying to update a lot more than I planned to. I can't promise you I'll update very quickly, but I do promise to try my best in doing so. Thank you so much all you reviewers, you're all great. As for chapter seven this one may be a long one or a short one. I didn't plan this chapter out all, so except some totally offhand don't know where anything is going writing.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Chapter 7  
  
*Miroku opened his eyes; chills were running down his spine. He was in a dark room and couldn't see anything; on top of him was young woman whose face he couldn't see. Miroku could feel a warm hand rubbing his face slowly working its way down. Miroku let out a small whimper. "Stop, please stop it. No more."  
  
The woman shot Miroku a mischievous smile. "What's the matter, don't you like it? Trust me, you wont be disappointed." She bent down and pressed her lips hard against Miroku's.  
  
Miroku struggled taking in air. He began to shiver; every muscle in his body was shaking. His body was slowly going numb. 'What's wrong with me? Why am I so cold?' Miroku's train of thought halted, his muscles tensed up. He could feel the woman's breast pushing on his chest as he was being held in a tight embrace. Miroku tried to push her away but he wasn't able to retaliate, his body was too weak to do anything against her. Tears began to fall from Miroku's face. A let out a small cry as more tears began to fall.  
  
The dark figure sat up releasing her hold on Miroku as she still sat on top of him. "Now what's the matter? Aren't you enjoying yourself?" A smile appeared on her face. "I'm having a wonderful time." She bent down and licked away Miroku's tears. "Don't cry, I'd think you'd be happy."  
  
Every nerve in Miroku's body had begun to tingle, every fiber of his body felt like it was crying. Everything hurt, nothing felt right inside of him. Miroku struggled to choke down his sobs. "What did you do to me?" More tears began to flow down Miroku's cheek. "What in the hell did you do!?"  
  
The woman slapped Miroku hard in the face, leaving a large red mark. "You ungrateful brat, you should be thanking me. I did you a favor, you're mine now and I'm not letting you go, ever."  
  
The word ever seemed to replay in Miroku's mind over and over again. He pushed down a large gulp. His voice was beginning to get shaky. "Ev. ever? Why, why are you doing this to me? Let me go, please. I don't want to do this, it's wrong, let me go." Miroku motioned to get up only to be slammed back to the ground.  
  
"I didn't say you could leave yet." She landed another hard blow in Miroku's face. "You listen to me, I'll say when I'm done with you, and I'm not done with you." She leaned forward and began giving Miroku an onslaught of hard kisses.  
  
Miroku's vision was becoming increasingly blurry he blinked his eyes a few times and tried to regain focus, everything began to spin and Miroku blacked out. Letting out a small whisper. "God, please let this just be a dream." *  
  
Miroku warily opened his eyes; his body was still numb from his dream. He looked around the hut realizing where he was. He breathed a deep sigh of relief. "It was only a dream." He closed his eyes tightly, the nightmare replayed in his mind. Miroku put his hand to his face wiping away his tears. "Why do memories always have to painful ones?" Miroku closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.  
  
Sango laid sprawled out on her futon, her eyes staring up at the ceiling. She let out a long sigh her thoughts still were still stuck on Miroku. "I wonder, who was that girl that was with Miroku-sama? What had he been doing with her?" Sango had a scowl on her face. "Probably something indecent, knowing him." A small tear crept down Sango's cheek, followed by a shower of others. "Miroku.. You big idiot." Sango's soft tears quickly turned into violent sobs.  
  
*Piku piku* Inuyasha's ears began to twitch at the sound of Sango's cries. He groaned and walked over to her. "Sango, what in the hell are you crying for now? I don't want Kagome to wake up and be pissed at me, so what's the problem."  
  
Sango was clearly upset and didn't want to talk with anyone, especially someone like Inuyasha. "Go away, Inuyasha, I'm not in the mood for this. Leave me, I'll be fine."  
  
Inuyasha sighed and sat down beside her. "Listen Sango, if you're so upset about Miroku you should find him and talk to him."  
  
Sango shot Inuyasha a death glare. "I've already talked to him, I have nothing to discuss with him."  
  
"Keh." Inuyahsa folded his arms. "Did you ever try to listen to Miroku, instead of just jumping to conclusions? Have you even heard his side? He's got more secrets than you may think. Try to actually listen to him, he may tell you something that would surprise you." Inuyasha looked over at Sango, she was giving him that, what the hell are you talking about look. "Hey, don't look at me like that. I'm just trying to help."  
  
Sango blushed slightly. "I'm sorry Inuyasha, but I've never seen you well. Well so concerned and making actual sense."  
  
"Eh?" Inuyasha's face -_-; . 'Stupid bitch.' "Ya well, it must be Kagome's niceness rubbing off on me or something. Don't expect me to always be this nice Sango." Inuyasha stood up and headed back to the corner he was residing in. He stopped for a moment and turned back to Sango. "Oh, one more thing, get some rest. Miroku would want you to have plenty of beauty sleep." Inuyasha smiled mildly and went back to his corner.  
  
Sango sat there for a moment she was literally stunned. 'Did Inuyasha just do something nice for me?' A small smile crept up Sango's face. 'It appears he may have a soft side after all, I'll be damned.' Sango nestled herself comfortable back in the futon and closed her eyes letting sleep overtake her. She had a small smile on her face. "Miroku."  
  
Inuyasha watched this all quietly from his corner he smiled to himself. "Good, seems Sango will be okay, for now at least." Inuyasha sighed gently. 'Miroku, you better fix things with Sango, we can't wait forever, and I hate being nice.' "Heh, I wonder how you're holding up Miroku. Hope you're alright."  
  
Kayou groggily opened her eyes and drew in a long yawn. She took a look a look over at Miroku who was sleeping soundly in the other side of the room and smiled to herself. 'He looks so cute when he's sleeping like that. I hate wake him but he should eat some breakfast.' Kayou got up and sat by Miroku's side. She shook him gently. "Wake up, come on sleepy head, its time for breakfast you need to wake up."  
  
Miroku squinted his eyes open slightly, he saw a fuzzy image of a young woman in front of him. "Sango?" Miroku looked at Kayou with disbelief in his eyes. "Is that you, Sango?"  
  
*Twitch twitch* Kayou could barely keep herself from screaming at him. 'That idiot, I swear he's obsessed with that other girl.' Kayou let out a quick sigh. 'I sure know how to pick'em.' Kayou shook her head. "No, it's Kayou Miroku, I'm not Sango."  
  
Miroku opened his eyes a little wider and sat up. He face was a tinge disappointed and confused. "I'm sorry Kayou, it's just you look a lot like Sango. I couldn't see very well."  
  
"Heh." Kayou crossed her arms and turned away from Miroku. "Would you rather it have been Sango, instead of me?"  
  
Miroku grimaced. "Kayou."  
  
Kayou scowled. "What!? Don't look at me like that Miroku, I'm sorry but I'm getting fed up with this." Kayou turned herself back around and got up close and personal with Miroku. "You obviously want her, so go get her! You're staying is only making things worse; you'll never be able to go back at this rate. Come on Miroku, it's time to let things heal." Kayou smiled brightly at him. "What to do say?"  
  
Miroku stared down at the futon, not letting his eyes meet with Kayou's. He took a deep breath. "I can't, I'm scared." Miroku lowered his head even lower.  
  
Kayou inched herself even closer to Miroku, she was sitting right beside him now. Her expression softened. "Why? Why are you so afraid? I know about your incident in the past but Sango would understand." Kayou extended her arm over Miroku's shoulder.  
  
"Don't. I don't need you to comfort me, I'll be fine." Miroku pulled himself away from Kayou's grasp. "Just leave me alone."  
  
"Forgive me Miroku." Kayou stood up and slapped Miroku hard across the face. "Just who do you think you are? I'm not trying to comfort you; I'm trying to be there for you. What you're going through isn't easy, and I'm trying to help. Don't be such an ass, let me help you. I've put up with your bullshit long enough."  
  
Miroku touched the red mark on his face, he looked stun. A single tear fell from Miroku's face. He winced in pain.  
  
Kayou rushed over to his side, her face full of concern. "Miroku, what is it? What's wrong?" She put her hand on his shoulder.  
  
Miroku took her hand and pulled her into a tight embrace. "Kayou, I'm very sorry, I never meant to be a burden like this." Miroku choked down a sob. "I'm just afraid if I tell Sango about what happened to me she would no longer accept me. I'm in love with her, I don't want to get my heart broken."  
  
"Miroku." Kayou stroked his bangs gently. "Love is worth taking the risk of rejection, if you really love her you'll tell her before it's too late. She can't wait forever Miroku."  
  
Miroku broke the hug between the two of them. "You're right Kayou, I can't wait forever to tell her, but I'm not ready yet. I won't wait forever, I just need more time to think."  
  
Kayou's face seemed to sadden a bit. "The longer you wait the harder it will be. What is it you're waiting for? What's holding you back from going to her right now?"  
  
Miroku's eyes seem to look off into space. "I don't know really, I'm still broken. Something is still missing, something I've lost long ago. I want to find it, I need to be whole again."  
  
"I see, then I have to ask Miroku. Are you totally confident in your feelings for Sango? Do you know for sure you're in love with her?" Kayou eyed him anticipating his reply.  
  
"Why? Why are you asking me this." Miroku stared deep into Kayou's brown eyes.  
  
"Because I'm in love with you."  
  
Sango quietly slipped on her kimono, the others were still sleeping and she tried her best not to wake them. She was going off to look for Miroku. She stood up and headed towards the door.  
  
"Wait. You aren't leaving without saying good bye, are you?" Inuyasha grinned at Sango evilly.  
  
Sango shot an angry glance at Inuyasha. "You know damn well I won't be gone for long, so there's no point in saying good bye."  
  
Inuyasha nodded solemnly. "So, then you are going off to find Miroku then." Inuyasha intensified the pleased look on his face. "I knew you would go after him, I'm not surprised."  
  
Sango smiled back. "I won't be gone long, I'll be back, with Miroku. Just wait a little longer Inuyasha."  
  
"Good luck."  
  
"Thanks." Sango walked out the door of their room and quickly ran out of the inn. 'I haven't given up looking for you yet Miroku, I'll find you and make things right again.'  
  
Miroku's eyes winded. He sat there in complete shock, he couldn't even blink his eyes. "What did you say?"  
  
"I'm sorry Miroku. I can't help it, you're one of the sweetest men I have met in my life. You stole my heart away."  
  
"That's why, that's why then, you wanted to know where my true feelings reside. Kayou, I don't know what to tell you."  
  
"So then I still have a chance? Is my situation totally lost?" Kayou moved closer to him, hoping he'd say yes.  
  
"Kayou, I."  
  
Miroku was interrupted but Kayou's lips pressing against his.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
So what do you think? You like this chapter? Ok, I know it's a little different than what I had originally previewed in my last chapter but other ideas came to me. Love it, hate it? Let me know, I'm dying to read the reviews for this chapter. Also a big huge thanks to all my reviewers so far.  
  
Inu-shounen~ Thank you so much for that review, it was a huge compliment you gave me about crying. You have no idea what that means to me. Thank you. And no, I have never considered writing stories as a profession, but thanks for thinking I would be good at it. For now though, it's just a passion not a profession.  
  
Aamalie~ Glad you're liking the story, and about Kayou backing off it was merely cuz she pitied Miroku so much for what happened to him. She just sorta got the message to piss off.  
  
Fanfictiongeek36~ Thanks, but this story isn't one of the best Sango/Miroku out there. I would definitely recommend Truly Madly Deeply by Sweet Chaos and A Love Sonnet by Zephor, those two are awesome stories. Oh, and I'm glad my story brought so many emotions and you love it so much. That makes me incredibly happy. Thank you.  
  
Sweet Chaos~ That is an interesting fact, I didn't know this, had no clue actually. Thanks again for reviewing.  
  
Rissi-Sama~ Nothing works out cuz neither of them are ready for things to work out. Miroku is still insecure and Sango just can't accept the fact Miroku might not be hers cuz of Kayou. Don't worry though, things will work out.  
  
Sentaku~ Thanks for the compliment, appreciate it. Hope this update was quick enough for you.  
  
Chris-Redfield26~ Wow, I can tell you how much I appreciated that review. I'm so very glad you think I'm actually improving and you're fascinated in the story. This is a big a compliment, thank you.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THANKS TO ALL MY REVIEWERS! I LUV YOU ALL SO MUCH! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!  
  
Next chapter, we find out Miroku's reaction to Kayou's kiss and we'll see if Sango has any luck finding her beloved monk.  
  
That's all for now, I plan on updating again on Friday, I'm not for sure so you may see an update earlier or later. Depends on school.  
  
Thanks again you guys!  
  
Adios,  
  
Zero 


	8. When you need me, I'll be there

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha; the only characters that are mine are Nayamashii and Kayou.  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep.'  
  
Authors note~ Okay, I've gotten a lot of interesting reviews regarding what's going to happen in this chapter. You will like what's going to happen, you wont be disappointed. I assure you, things will work out. Just be patient with me. Whether or not I may look like it I do know what I' am doing. Thanks to all your reviewers, I appreciate the reviews. Enjoy the 8th chapter.  
  
Chapter 8  
  
Miroku quickly pulled away from the kiss. His face was of mixed emotions all of which weren't happy. His eyes seemed deep and far off and had a small frown. "Kayou, I'm very sorry." Miroku moved closer and pulled Kayou close to him. He wrapped her in his arms and let out a small sigh. "I'm sorry you fell in love with me, because my heart belongs to another."  
  
Kayou did her best to hide her tears but it was to no avail. Tears quickly began to fall from her cheeks. "Then go and find her. You can't afford to wait any longer." Kayou broke the hug and smiled gently at him. "I'm sorry for kissing you but I needed something to remember you by."  
  
Miroku gazed at her strangely, his eyebrows toughed up. "What are you talking about? I don't understand Kayou."  
  
"I knew you would be leaving soon I just wanted to give you that extra push. I know you weren't in love with me but I fell in love with you. Seeing you hurting like this is hurting me as well." She moved closer to him and whispered gently into his ear. "Go find happiness, forget your fear and be happy."  
  
Miroku nodded, closing his eyes solemnly. "You're right Kayou, I will find my happiness. I'll go find Sango." Miroku stood up and motioned to the door. "Thank you for everything, I wont soon forget you." Miroku gave Kayou a large grin. "Remember, good bye's aren't forever." Miroku turned and walked out the door.  
  
Kayou watched as Miroku left her. Her tears hadn't ceased but she quickly wiped them away. "I'll be sure to remember that. Miroku."  
  
Miroku began running at full speed to the village he'd been at last. He was almost flying it was like his feet weren't even touching the ground. No doubt or worry clouded his mind. All his hesitation and fear was forgotten, Sango was the only thing he cared about. 'Sango, I'm coming wait for me. I'll be there for you."  
  
Inuyasha let out a low growl. 'Damn, Sango still isn't back yet. I would have thought she'd find that stupid monk by now.' He crossed his arms in disgust.  
  
Kagome noticed Inuyasha's strange behavior and was beginning to wonder what was going on. When she awoke Sango was gone and Inuyasha didn't say anything as to why she had left. It was beginning to annoy her. "Inuyasha, what's going on? Where is Sango?"  
  
"She went off looking for Miroku this morning."  
  
"Wait! What!? This morning? She should be back by now..."  
  
Inuyasha tried to hide his frustration. He dug his claws into the floor. "I know that. That's why I'm beginning to get worried."  
  
Kagome simply nodded, she too was a tad frustrated. "I hope nothing bad has happened to her." Kagome moved closer to Inuyasha. She needed his comfort now more than ever. "Inuyasha. Do you think she's alright?"  
  
Inuyasha sighed lightly. He wrapped his strong arms around Kagome lovingly, holding her in a strong embrace. "I'm sure she'll be fine Kagome. Sango can take care of herself, so don't worry." 'Miroku, where in the hell are you!? Sango needs you!'  
  
Just then Miroku burst in through the door. He fell to one knee and began panting struggling to stay conscious. "Where is Sango?" Inuyasha broke the hug with Kagome and walked over to his friend. He picked him up off the ground and landed a hard punch in his face. "Miroku where the hell have you been!"  
  
Miroku quickly recovered from the blow and stared at Inuyasha with fire in his. "Inuyasha I don't have time to fight with you. Where is Sango!?"  
  
Inuyasha stared at him a tad shocked for a moment. 'I don't believe him, I hit the guy right in the face and he totally blows it off as if it's nothing. He must really want to see her.' Inuyasha put his hand on his friends shoulder. His face softened towards him. "Miroku I'm sorry, I don't know where Sango is. She left this morning to go look for you and we haven't seen her since."  
  
The shock was apparent in Miroku's eyes and he was beginning to get choked up. 'Sango.' Miroku made a tight fist, blood began to trickle from his palm to the floor. "I'll go after her then. I'll be back soon, with Sango." Miroku turned around and ran out the door. 'Sango I'm coming.'  
  
Inuyasha could smell Miroku's blood that had dripped unto the floor. He sat and stared back at the door for a while totally lost in thought. 'I can't believe how serious he is about finding Sango. I've never seen him so worked up like this. I just hope that idiot doesn't do something stupid that he's going to regret.' Inuyasha looked over at Kagome and frowned. "Kagome I have a bad feeling about all this."  
  
Kagome nodded. "I think you're right, but this is between Miroku and Sango we'll let them handle it. Don't worry so much Inuyasha, Sango will be fine."  
  
Inuyasha stared back down at the blood on the floor. "It's not Sango who I'm worried about, it's Miroku."  
  
Miroku was nearly out of the village even though he had been sprinting the whole time he hadn't gotten too far. He was still exhausted from trying to get back to the village. Miroku stopped for a moment to catch his breath. 'Damnit, at this rate it'll take forever to find Sango. I wish I hadn't used up all my energy already. I have to find her, I have to.' Miroku felt a hand on his shoulder he turned to see Nayamashii standing over him. Miroku's eyes nearly came out of his sockets. "Nayamashii?"  
  
"Don't sound too happy to see me Miroku. You seem exhausted you should really rest." A smile came over the young woman's face.  
  
Miroku quickly removed Nayamashii's hand from his shoulder. "Leave me be, I have to go find Sango."  
  
Nayamashii stood still pondering Miroku's words. "Sango. Sango. Hmmm.. Oh! Isn't that the girl who I met with you a few days ago?"  
  
"Yes, now if you excuse me I have to go." Miroku pushed Nayamashii aside and started to walk off.  
  
"Wait Miroku! Forget about her, she doesn't want you. She'll never accept you for who you really are. Nobody wants someone as tainted as you are." A sick twisted look came over her face. "I'm the only one who can truly save you. Come back to me my Miroku."  
  
Miroku gritted his teeth. He walked back over to Nayamashii and gave her a hard slap to the face. "Shut up you bitch! I'm tired of you tormenting me! I'm not yours, I'm not your play thing. What you did to me all those years ago was twisted and wrong. I'm not afraid of you anymore, I'm no longer yours." Miroku tightened his grip on his staff. "You hold no power over me and it's time you realized that. Good bye, you creepy bitch." Miroku turned around and began to walk off again.  
  
Nayamashii touched the mark Miroku had made on her cheek and smiled to herself. "Miroku, I'm proud of you."  
  
Miroku turned back around for a moment and faced Nayamashii. "Excuse me."  
  
"You've grown up, you're not that scared little boy I once knew."  
  
Miroku gazed at her with intensity in his eyes, and a burning desire to find the one who cared for most. "You're right, I'm not." Miroku turned back around to begin his search for Sango.  
  
"Wait! You're friend, I saw her heading towards the forest. You may find her there."  
  
Miroku simply nodded and ran off. 'Sango I'm coming, nothing will stop me now. I will find you.' Miroku broke out into an all out sprint for the forest. Every breath he drew in, every step he took, every beat of his heart all lead him closer to Sango. Miroku could see the forest within his view he stopped for a moment and caught his breath. He waited a moment and went into a mad dash into the forest. He entered the forest and began his search for Sango.  
  
Sango lay motionless under a tree, she had a deep cut on her head and had lost a good deal of blood. She watched in horror as the bear youkai readied to finish her off. She drew in what she thought to be her last breath and squeezed herself tightly. 'Miroku.' Tears began to trickle down her face.  
  
The bear youkai swung his claws deep into Sango's flesh blood spattered everywhere. Sango opened her eyes and froze in fear. Standing before her was a wounded Miroku.  
  
Miroku immediately fell to the ground. He grabbed his stomach in attempts to stop the blood that had been oozing out. He turned over to Sango and forced a small smile. "I know I'm not much help to you now with this hole in my gut, but I promise I'll protect you." Miroku eased himself up from the ground only to be struck down by the bear youkai. Miroku could feel a siring pain from his right shoulder and collapsed back to the ground.  
  
Sango was in complete shock her eyes were focused on the terribly beaten Miroku. 'Miroku.' "Miroku!"  
  
Miroku struggled to get to his feet but was able to. "Sango don't worry, I'll be alright. I'll finish off this over sized teddy bear in but a moment." Miroku grasped his left hand tightly on his right wrist and rose up towards the youkai. The injury the bear youkai had inflicted before hand on Miroku's arm was taking its toll. A tremendous amount of pain shot up through Miroku's arm. He let out a small scream of pain. "WIND-TUNNEL!" Miroku unsealed the wind-tunnel and drew the bear youkai. He turned towards Sango and smiled gently at her. "I told you I would protect you." Miroku immediately fell to the ground.  
  
Sango still sat there she was completely shocked by what just happened. She got up and ran to Miroku's side. "Miroku, are you alright?" Sango shook him gently. "Answer me." Sango could feel the feel the sticky feeling of the warm red liquid all over Miroku's robes, he was soaked in blood. A small tear fell to the ground. Sango hugged Miroku tightly. "Oh Miroku. Why? Why did you let yourself get hurt so terribly for me?" Tears flowed down Sango's cheeks as she held Miroku in her arms.  
  
Miroku stirred, he could feel Sango's tears on his cheeks. He raised his left arm to her face and wiped away her tears. "Please don't cry Sango, a face like yours should also be smiling."  
  
Sango was taken back by Miroku's tender touch and gentle words. She let out a small sob. "You idiot! What were you thinking? You could have gotten killed."  
  
"If it meant saving your life it was worth it. I was really worried about you Sango. I'm very sorry for all this pain I've put you through.I." Miroku could feel Sango's finger over his mouth and stopped speaking.  
  
"Shhhhhh. Don't try to speak, we can talk later right now we need to get you back to the others so that we can properly treat your wounds."  
  
"No, I want to stay like this wrapped in your arms. I want to stay here with you, alone. I need to talk to you now, I don't want to put this off any longer. There are many things you don't know about my past that you should be aware of."  
  
"Miroku." Sango looked at him worriedly. 'Why is he being so stubborn? What's so important that he has to tell me now?' Sango sighed. "Fine, tell me what you want to say."  
  
"Remember how this whole argument was about that night Nayamashii had kissed me and I ran off after you told me you had hated me?"  
  
Sango bit down hard on her lip, just thinking about that incident made her very upset. "Yes, I remember."  
  
"When I was a young man my travels had taken me to that village when I was about 14 years old. At that time I had been injured and Nayamashii found me unconscious on the streets and took me back to her home."  
  
Sango began to listen to the story with an active interested. "What happened between you two when she brought you back?"  
  
Miroku's face saddened a deep feeling of sorrow over took him. "She raped me. I was so weak and injured I couldn't do anything to stop her. She did sick things to me and violated every part of me. It hurt so much and I was afraid. I had nobody to there to help me, I was completely alone."  
  
"Miroku, I'm so very sorry you had to go through anything like that. I didn't know I had thought." Sango held Miroku even tighter in her arms. "I'm here with you now Miroku, you have me."  
  
"All this time I had been afraid you wouldn't want to be with someone who was so tainted and dirty. I didn't want to get hurt again Sango, I was afraid of being taken advantage of. I don't want to be played with. When you said you had hated me everything broke. I was scared and unsure of myself, there was something I had wanted to tell you that night."  
  
Sango's voice quivered. "Wha. What, was it Miroku."  
  
"I love you."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
That's it, that's all she wrote for this chapter. It was fairly long so I don't want to hear any complaints or anything like that. I know I left it at and awful cliff hanger but I couldn't help it. I love to make you people suffer! ^_~ Just kidding, it's just fun to end at cliff hanger. Now, the big question on everyone's mind I'm sure is how will Sango react. She's gone through a whole lot this chapter and now this. Man, she's going through and emotional roller coaster right now. Any way, I'm probably going out of town this weekend so I wouldn't expect an update till Tuesday or Wednesday. I'm not making any promises, it could be earlier or it could be later. Just be patient with me.. Thanks to all the reviewers for chapter 7! I really appreciate the reviews!  
  
Inu-shounen~ How's this for wrapping up loose ends? Hope you enjoyed the chapter, I think you did. I hope you did.  
  
Sango-chan~ Short! That was 2,000 some words! I worked my ass off! Glad you like it though. Please keep reviewing!  
  
Sweet Chaos~ Yes, I do have a comma problem. I' am slowly overcoming it though. I'll do my best and work on my grammar.  
  
Kitori~ Yes, Sango is Miroku's not Kayou she's aware of that and as you can see things just didn't work out between the two of them. Hope you liked this chapter though.  
  
Kyosnekozukigirl~ Damn your name is hard to write! He he he, well as you can see Sango didn't walk in on the two of them. I couldn't let that happen seeing as Sango doesn't know where in the hell Kayou's hut is. Besides this way Miroku looks damn good in front of Sango.  
  
Rain angst~ Glad you love it, glad it's great.  
  
Rissi-Sama~ Things got much better now didn't they? He he he. ^^  
  
Aamalie~ Ah, you mean Nayamashii! Yes, well as you can see she was brought back and then put in her place. See, I wasn't mean and had Sango walk in or anything like that.  
  
Fanfictiongeek36~ Yes, I'll finish the story and make sure everyone is happy and all that what not.  
  
Missy-Bee~ Chill, Sango isn't gonna beat Kayou she has no reason to. She's Miroku's and he told Kayou that. So don't worry bout it.  
  
That's all the reviews for the 7th chapter, I can't wait to see some of the reviews for this one. Keep'em coming guys! Thanks!  
  
Adios for now!  
  
Zero 


	9. Overcome The Nightmare, Live The Dream

Disclaimer~ I don't own Inuyasha; the only characters that are mine are Kayou and Nayamashii.  
  
Dialog~ "Meep meep meep."  
  
Thoughts~ 'Meep meep meep'  
  
Authors note~ I think this going to be the last or second to the last chapter of My Paper Heart. I'm honestly not sure yet, I didn't plan this chapter out at all so god only knows where it may end up. Any way, thanks to all the reviewers I had this chapter. I really appreciate it.  
  
Chapter 9  
  
Miroku stood in horror as he watched his younger self being rapped by Nayamashii. Miroku couldn't move or speak; all he could do is stand there.  
  
Miroku's younger self began to scream. He was crying out for someone to help him. His eyes looked pleadingly to the older Miroku standing before him, watching. "Why don't you help me? Do something!" Tears streaked down the boy's face. "Please, help me."  
  
Miroku's heart sank, the fear in the boy's voice the scared expression on his face, it was all too much for Miroku. Miroku did his best to choke down his tears. He let out a small whisper. "Leave him alone."  
  
Another chilling scream rang out from the boy's mouth.  
  
Miroku tightened his grip. His voice was now audible. "Leave him alone."  
  
Nayamashii bent down and liked the younger Miroku's face.  
  
The younger Miroku's face was full of fear, his pupils grew small his voice began to shake. "Stop, please just stop."  
  
Miroku tightened his fist even more. He too now was crying. He loud out a strong yell. So loud he was nearly screaming. "Leave him alone!"  
  
Miroku's eyes shot wide-open he let out a small scream. It took him a moment to realize where it is he was. His heart was pounding, he was drenched in sweat, and he couldn't stop shaking. He drew in a deep breath. "It was only a dream." Miroku plopped back down on his back. He let out a small groan. He could feel pain aching everywhere in his body. 'Is this how Inuyasha always feels?'  
  
Sango entered the room, carrying a whole bunch of bandages and bottle of antiseptic. Her eyes wondered over to the groaning monk. She frowned and walked over to his side. "Miroku, are you alright?"  
  
His eyes traveled over to the concerned demon slayer sitting next to him. "What happened Sango?" Miroku put his hand to his forehead. "I can't exactly recall what happened."  
  
Sango stared silently at the floor a light shade of red tinted her face. "We were in the woods and you protected me from a bear youkai." Sango's face grew a deeper red. "You were badly injured but said you wanted to tell me something before we went back to find Inuyasha and Kagome."  
  
The sudden realization of what had happened that night just hit Miroku. He nodded solemnly to her. "Yes, I remember now."  
  
Sango couldn't stop blushing. "More happened than that Miroku."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"I was scared and unsure of myself, there was something I had wanted to tell you that night."  
  
Sango's voice quivered. "Wha. What, was it Miroku."  
  
"I love you."  
  
Sango froze at his sudden confession. "You what?" Sango rubbed her eyes. 'I must be dreaming.'  
  
Miroku stared at her with his big brown eyes and warm smile. "I'm in love with you." Miroku's voice quieted a bit. "I'm going to kiss you, I hope you kiss back." Miroku hoisted himself up from the ground and moved himself closer to Sango. He pressed his lips gently against hers. He started to move his lips away only to be pulled back in by Sango's lips.  
  
Sango reluctantly broke the kiss and stared deep into Miroku's eyes. She nearly had lost her voice. "I love you too." Sango's emotions overflowed. She hugged him tightly. "I love you too, Miroku. Don't ever let me go."  
  
Miroku smiled. "Don't worry, I don't plan on it." Miroku gently stroked Sango's hair. The two of them were lost in one another's arms. Miroku's eyes grew heavy and he quickly slipped off into the nothingness of sleep. His strong grasp over Sango loosened and the sound of snoring could be heard.  
  
"Miroku?" Sango looked back up at the sleeping monk. A wide smile was spread across her face. "You poor thing, you must be exhausted. I should take you back to the inn. You're wounds are still very serious." Sango struggled to lift Miroku up from the ground but was able to sling him over her shoulders. She whispered gently into his ears. "Sleep well my houshi- sama." Sango smiled and began her long walk back to the inn.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Now it was Miroku's turn to blush. "I see." Miroku smiled and moved closer to Sango. "I meant what I had said though, I'm in love with you. I want you Sango, I'd give it all away for you."  
  
Sango looked at Miroku strangely. She almost looked irritated for a moment. "Is that why? Is that why you risked your life to save me? Or is this just a trick?"  
  
Miroku wrapped his arms around Sango. "If it was a trick I would have never kissed you that night. I was always just afraid, I didn't want to be hurt again Sango." Miroku tightened his grip around Sango. "I don't want to hurt you, I want to be with you."  
  
"Then be with me." Sango lifted up her head and gave Miroku a long passionate kiss.  
  
Miroku broke the kiss for a moment to let himself breath and before he knew it the two of them were entangled with each other and sprawled out on the futon.  
  
Miroku turned to Sango who was busy catching her breath. "Now that we've gone this far there's no turning back. You know that right?"  
  
Sango nodded and sat up. "I don't regret though Miroku. I'm glad to be yours now Miroku. But what about that nasty habit you have with women?"  
  
Miroku slid his hand over to Sango's and held it tightly. "You're mine now Sango, and I have no need for any other."  
  
Sango squeezed back hard. Tears were beginning to fall. "I'm glad to be yours. Thank you Miroku."  
  
"Don't thank me, just kiss me." Miroku pulled her close to him and was enveloped in Sango's sweet lips.  
  
The two of them lay sleeping with each other. Sango was nuzzled up close to Miroku with his arms wrapped around her tightly.  
  
Inuyasha walked in the door followed by Kagome and Shippo. All three of their eyes nearly fell out of their sockets.  
  
Kagome could do nothing but gape and point.  
  
Inuyasha smiled and crossed his arms looking at the two with a small smirk on his face. "It's about time."  
  
Shippo couldn't stop giggling.  
  
Kagome turned to Inuyasha. "What do you we do now Inuyasha?"  
  
"Keh. You stupid wench that should be obvious. We leave the two of them alone. They've both been through hell and they need to be alone with each other right now." Inuyasha turned and walked out the door and turned back to look over at Kagome for a moment. "Come on, let's go."  
  
"Inuyasha?" Kagome shook her head and ran out of the room with Shippo clinging on for dear life. Taking one last glance at the couple she smiled to herself. 'I'm glad for you Sango, you two deserve each other.'  
  
Miroku opened his eyes wearily letting out a small yawn. "Man, what time is it?" He noticed Sango snuggled next to him and brushed her bangs out of her face. "Hope you're sleeping well Sango." Miroku studied the young demon slayer. He was totally pulled in by her beauty. 'Man she's gorgeous. I'm really a lucky guy.' Miroku bent down and gave her a soft kiss on the cheek. Whispering gently into her ear. "I love you."  
  
Sango stirred for a moment and smiled lightly. "Mmm Miroku." She opened her eyes reluctantly and looked up at Miroku. "You sleep well?"  
  
"Yeah, I did. For once I stopped having nightmares. I haven't slept that well in a long time."  
  
"Nightmares?" Sango was beginning to get interested. "What sort of nightmares?"  
  
Miroku's face dimmed and looked sadly at her. "Bad memories of something I would have liked to forget. Sometimes not all memories can be happy ones sadly."  
  
Sango put her hand over Miroku's face and moved it down slowly stopping at his heart. "Sometimes we need to be reminded of past mistakes, even if they are painful."  
  
Miroku clasped his hand over Sango's. "I won't need to be reminded now that I have you here with me. Let's make a clean break, lets live our lives happily together."  
  
Sango looked at Miroku sadly. "Miroku, you know that can't happen. We still need to defeat Naraku. I need to get my brother back and you need to get rid of the curse in your hand."  
  
"I know, but I still want to make a clean break with you. I'm sorry for all the pain I've put you through but lets be together now. Lets be there for one another."  
  
"We've always been there for each other, nothing will change in us making a clean break."  
  
Miroku shook his head furiously. "You weren't mine before, now you are and I'll do all I can to protect you. I wont ever let anything happen to you." Miroku kissed her sweetly on the lips. "I promise."  
  
Sango looked into Miroku's eyes. "Miroku."  
  
"From now on I'm yours and your mine. We belong to each other and when this whole ordeal with Naraku is over we'll live happily with one another."  
  
"Sounds good, I just hope this isn't a dream."  
  
Miroku kissed her again with more passion. "It's reality, believe it."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~One week later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Inuyasha let out a silent growl. "Damn you Miroku, because of you we're way behind in our search for Naraku and the fragments of the Shikon Jewel." He crossed his arms and continued walking beside Kagome and Shippo.  
  
Kagome shot Inuyasha a death stare. "Inuyasha, sit boy."  
  
*Thud* Inuyasha peeled himself off the ground and shook a fist at Kagome. "Damn you wench!"  
  
Kagome was about to sit Inuyasha again when Miroku intervened.  
  
"Please, there's no need to sit him again." Miroku turned to Inuyasha. "I'm sorry for slowing us down but it was a necessary obstacle I needed to over come." Miroku walked beside Sango and her hand tightly in his own.  
  
Kagome, Inuyasha's, and Shippo's face. O.O  
  
Miroku turned to the rest of them and smiled. "Like I said, I needed to overcome a few obstacles."  
  
Sango blushed slightly but still held Miroku's hand tightly. She turned to the rest of the group with an annoyed look on her face. "Well, are you guys going to stand and gawk at us all day, or are we going to get back to our quest?"  
  
*Blank faces all around*  
  
Inuyasha grinned. "Sango's right, we need to get our asses in gear. Come on guys lets go!" Inuyasha sprang forward with a surge of energy running through him.  
  
Miroku's face brimmed with excitement. "Come on guys! Let's go!" Miroku broke his grasp of Sango's hand and ran towards Inuyasha. "Hey wait up Inuyasha!"  
  
Kagome, Shippo, and Sango all let out long sighs.  
  
Sango smiled and started running after the two idiots. "Come on guys! We can't leave those two alone, god knows what sorts of hell they may unleash!"  
  
Kagome smacked her forehead. "God you're right! Let's go Sango!" Kagome followed by Sango bolted off towards Inuyasha and Miroku. Kagome smiled to herself. 'It's seems everything worked out for the best. Sango and Miroku are finally together and we're back on track on our quest to defeat Naraku and find more of the jewel fragments. Happy day!' Kagome quickly fell behind from the others. "Hey guys wait up!" Kagome joined her friends all of them smiling happily.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of chapter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Okay, so it's not the best ending in the world but there wasn't too much needing to be wrapped up. Things have been resolved between Sango and Miroku and everyone is able to keep moving on. I really hope you enjoyed the story, because I loved writing it. The whole message of the story was sort of letting yourself trust even if bad things have happened in the past you can just close yourself out to others forever. Thanks to all the reviewers I had, all you guys kick ass. Thanks! ^_^  
  
Inu-Shounen~ Yup, you're right as usual things wouldn't have worked out well if he didn't tell her first.  
  
Sweet-Chaos~ Glad you're enjoying all the angst and drama. I live for those sort of stories. Hope you liked the ending, even if lacked dramatics.  
  
Aamalie~ You're right happy ending, yay, all is well!  
  
Kyosnekozukigirl~ I'm sorry but it's difficult to update sometimes with school and other shit going on. But be happy cuz I wasn't planning on putting up this chapter till Tuesday or Wednesday possibly even Thursday.  
  
Missy-Bee~ Shippo doesn't deserve to be in my fic a lot. He sucks and should die.  
  
Rissi-sama~ Thanks, I'm glad to hear it.  
  
Fanficitoingeek36~ Thanks a whole lot, and I just love to leave things at cliffhangers. It's so fun!  
  
Rain angst~ Glad you enjoyed it so much.  
  
Libra071988~ Hope this update came soon enough. Thanks for the review.  
  
That's all the reviewers I got for chapter 8. Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed. Especially Inu-shounen, Sweet-Chaos, and Rissi-sama. You guys are my loyalist reviewers. Thank you!  
  
Be on the look out for my next story, Crimson Tears. As always it's a Sango/Miroku fic, cuz I suck at any other kind. However, this one takes place in present time. Miroku is emotionally pushed over the edge after the loss of his parents and now Mushin. He is forced to move to a new area and attend a new school. He begins living with his new guardian who is always getting into an argument with Miroku. This begins to push Miroku so much he begins slitting his wrists. This is basically a story of over coming an extreme amount of pain and making it through the hard times even when it seems impossible. This can be summed into one word as an emotional-roller coaster.  
  
Thanks again to all my reviewers! I hope you guys will check out Crimson Tears! Thanks again and again and again!  
  
Adios for now,  
  
Zero. 


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